Children and parents are in conflict for one or more reasons. Often it is observed that as soon as you become a
parent, you find yourself already in conflict with your child. This is true and does not differ whether you are a parent through birth, adoption, step, fostering or blended family. It is not that parents of specific group or level have conflicts.
It has been observed that parents in all walks of life, from every socioeconomic level and from any religious belief have conflicts with their children on one or more matters. All parents want to have and maintain a good relationship with their children. This dream and wish gets fulfilled up to some extent when parents share. You definitely want your children to live to grow up.
Reasons of Conflict Between Parents and Children
Here are few reasons for fights between parents and children.
Love and Care
As soon as any woman comes to know about the growing fetus in her womb, she gets concerned about the health and well being of the child and is always taking care of the safety. The same is the case with her spouse and this continues forever. Parents make all possible efforts to take care of the health, safety and survival of their children.
When the child grows, the over love and care irritates him and there is a conflict between the two. Even though both are right and justified in their situations, there is a conflict. All parents want to hold their children close and children wish to set free as soon as possible. Conflict rises because each is trying to drag the other in opposite direction.
Restrictions and Limitations
Children want to explore their world and what to enter it with no worries of safety and concern. They want to discover and investigate everything on their own. Many parents spend their time giving instructions to their children about one or the other and here rise conflicts.
You can slowly increase the freedom and teach them how to stay safe while exploring the world and making new friends and situations for themselves. Teach them to handle the little more freedom that you are going to give them safely.
Changing Perspective
Conflicts occur when parents do not consider the changing perspectives. Children go through different types of changes and parents experience the changing behaviour and attitude and most often find it very difficult to predict things. The parents who recognise these as normal can deal with these changes automatically. They can be flexible as their kids tend to grow.
No matter what the cause behind argument or disagreement is parent-child conflicts have inimitable and exceptional properties. It is obvious because there is duration in the relation and both of them cannot escape the bond they share. This relationship is one of the most emotionally tensed ones.
Unless the issue is complicated, the arguments and disagreements hurt each other’s feelings. For parents it is very difficult to digest the notion that children who are completely dependent on them will grow up one day and have their own ideas and make up their own ways.
Well, there are some ground rules that work almost in all situations. Listen to each other’s problems and views, avoid sarcasm and name calling. Try to develop mutual understanding and understand what exactly the problem is and what the decisive goal of association should be. Make the judgmental responses free from disrespectful and discourteous expressions and comebacks.