Register | Login
Login
Sign in with:
---------- OR ----------
Create Account | Login
Create account
As a Member You Can:
  • Join clubs to discuss your interests
  • Connect with people like you
  • Share information, seek advice, get support

   
parenting
in Mumbai (change city)
Select City
  • All
  • Delhi
  • New Delhi
  • Gurgaon
  • Noida
  • Mumbai
  • Pune
  • Banglore
  • Hyderabad
  • Ghaziabad
  • Chandigarh
  • Ahmedabad
  • Kolkata
  • Chennai
  • Coimbatore
  • Jaipur
 
Raising Children Topics..

 
You are here : home > Raising Children > Parental Dilemmas > Personality Plus - II

Personality Plus - II

Children's emotions change in every minute. Handling such emotions is a skill. Read on to find out more about how your personality affects that of your children, and what you can do to bring out the best in them.

How do you react to your child's anger and moodiness?


The neutral parent: "Anything goes"

Have you ever told your child, "I love you. Never mind if you did poorly in a subject, or never mind if you failed this time. You now know you need to work harder the next time."

Naturally you express concern for your child's hurt feelings. So you let them know you love them unconditionally. You may also allow them to cry and express their anger or hurt, it's healthier than keeping them bottled up.

Do you also worry that setting limits and disciplining your children may make them feel that your love is dependent on their good behaviour? How often do you end up "yelling and screaming" along with them?

Sometimes letting things run their course does not always produce the best results.


Lost opportunities to grow closer to the child

What's missing from this parenting style? It's not acceptance, since you are very accepting of their emotions and their expressing them. It's not good intentions, since you accept the effects of an emotionally expressive child, at least until your patience runs out. Something else, some crucial additional element, seems to be missing.

In addition to being allowed to freely experience their emotions, children need to be encouraged to understand them as well. Without this, children don't learn how to regulate their emotions and often find it difficult to calm down after a tantrum. They may find it difficult to concentrate on learning new skills, often getting frustrated and giving up. They may find it harder to make and keep friends.


The empathizing parent: coach and guide

For some, this style comes naturally. For others, it means a few changes starting with a personal attitude about emotions and how to deal with them.

The difficult part in empathising is that it involves teaching children what emotions are and how emotions work, often in the midst of an emotionally charged event. When emotions are running high, a parent needs to be able to help the child deal with it before they become bigger problems.


The "how to" guide

    Value your child's feelings, but not all behaviors, because children need to learn how to handle their emotions as well.

    Be aware of the child's emotions. It becomes easier with practice.

    Recognize emotional times as "magic moments" and as opportunities for intimacy and teaching.

    Listen empathetically and validate the child's feelings

    Help the child verbally label emotions

    Setting limits while helping the child problem-solve

    Avoid agreeing with the "enemy" when a child feels mistreated


    Daily Conversation

    Engage your child in conversation at least once a day that is non-pejorative, and that allows you to learn something about what's important to him and what is going on in his life.


    Relationship-building

    Separate disciplinary discussions from relationship-building discussions.

    Emotions ,
    Consequences

    Set up clear consequences for infractions of rules, however, make sure that the consequences begin lightly and increase only as same behaviors are repeated.


    Self-expression and high-level thinking

    Allow and encourage discussion of your child's feelings about rules and standards, and allow for disagreement. You have the final word, but understanding your child's point of view and giving him the chance to verbalize it will increase his thinking capacities as well as encourage the successful handling of negative emotions.


    Differences

    Acknowledge individual differences. Approach your child always with respect for his individual temperament, especially when different from yours.

    Remember that ultimately your child will internalize who you are. If you deal with your child from a position of both love and strength, then that's what he or she will take in and own.


Personality Plus - I

You may also be interested in:

Poor Immunity in Kids
(32214 views)
Fussy Eating Habits
(21214 views)
Personality Plus - II
(8253 views)
Stay at home Dads
(15015 views)
Role of Grandparents
(87683 views)
Chaos Control
(7466 views)
Cancel
Save Edit
parenting
Notifications
6 Comments
Sort by Newest

Janvi.7 years ago
very true. every child tries to imitate and be like the parent - at least when the child is still young. so it is important for a parent to display those aspects of his personality that he wants his child to emulate.
 
 
 
.
Reply
Sheela.7 years ago
can you provide some concrete examples to this article?
 
 
 
.
Reply
sujata.7 years ago
 
 
 
.
Reply
Back to Previous Page   |   More on Raising Children Index

 
 
Discussion Forum - Recent Posts
Do you know your personality affects your child’s too? Do you behave properly in front of your kids? Have you connected with your child well?
view more >>
DISCUSSION FORUMS ON
Raising Children
RE:Good Maid agency
Hello dear according to me you should not hire maid from an agency because ... - Anita    read >>

RE:Good Maid agency
hello dear this is very simple and you can select from google by just putti ... - Anaida    read >>

RE:Good Maid agency
Hi there if you are really looking for a maid in gurgaon area then please c ... - Anu    read >>

RE:Good Maid agency
Hello dear if you are really looking for a change then please tell me and i ... - Anushree    read >>



All tips on Parental Dilemmas
You ever wanted in one place.
No need to go anywhere else. No spam.

*No spam only genuine emails
Follow us on:




Featured Articles - Infertility | Baby Development | Health and Fitness | How to Get Pregnant | Parenting Advice | Weight Loss | Pregnancy Advice | Name Numerology
Baby - Baby Photo Contest | Lucky Names | Lucky Birthdates | Horoscopes | Chinese Calendar | Compatibility Test | Fun Zone
Parenting - Message Boards | Planning a Baby | Pregnancy | Parents of Babies | Baby Names | Baby Name Poll | Birth Announcements | Parenting Quiz
Family - Cooking Club | Love & Relationships | Beauty Tips | Kids Weight Calculator | Recipe Maker
General - Calorie Counter | Personality Quiz | Love Signs | Compatibility Quiz
Home | Site Map | Privacy Policy | Comments or Suggestions | Indiaparenting News Articles | Contact Us | Advertise with Us | | RSS
Copyright (c) 1999 - 2017 India Parenting Pvt. Ltd.

ASK A QUESTION
What are the signs that a child is spoiled? How to establish good behaviour in children? How to say ...
ASK NOW !