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Raising Children Topics..

You are here : home > Raising Children > Parental Relationships > My Father, My Friend

My Father, My Friend

My Father, My Friend

All fathers who are involved in their child's upbringing and are friends with their offspring, make the best parents.

Fathers often believe that their job with regard to child rearing is limited to cootchie cooing the baby every now and again and leaving the rest to mum, while they concentrate on their work.

Children with fathers that are involved hands-on in their upbringing grow up to be much closer to their families and parents than children who barely saw their fathers when growing up.

There is no one else in the world that will have such a major impact on a child's upbringing, or that will love and understand him as well as his mother and father do.


Children need the attention of their fathers much more than you realise, or than they let on. Just loving your children is not enough. Be there for them when they need you, and spend some time talking to them. Typically, you may be tempted to spend all time discussing their progress at school or career prospects. Consider talking to them also about their friends, and discuss harmless office gossip with them. Be a friend to your child. This way they will be more involved in your life and you will be more involved in theirs.

Looking after

For you to take decisions regarding your child's upbringing in matters such as friends, discipline, pocket money, giving responsibilities etc, you need to contribute to looking after him as well. Not only will this help you bond with your child better, but your wife will also get a much-needed break.


In general children with healthier family lives, where both parents are loving, supportive and involved, do better in their studies as teenagers than children whose fathers are too busy to spend time with them.

Self Esteem

Children with involved fathers tend to have higher self-esteem than children whose fathers are constantly preoccupied with work and have little time for the kids. When you spend time with your child, you give your child the impression that he is worth your time. But when you are too busy, your child feels he is not good enough.


Studies have shown that women are more prone to depression than men. A large part of this is due to unsupportive husbands and single-handedly rearing children - a job that can be tiring in the extreme, and emotionally draining when children tend to be difficult. When two people are involved, mothers can take the back seat at times and let papa handle a difficult situation.


If you as a father involve yourself in your child's life, you will see the benefits in the long run, when your child involves you in his life as much as he can. You will continue to be a part of your child's life, and he will look forward to having you around for help, advice and companionship. When 24-year-old Varun shifted to Hong Kong from the USA, he asked his father, Shashi, to join him from India. They went apartment hunting together, and Shashi returned to India after helping Varun set up his new apartment. They had a great time sightseeing, visiting bars and generally exploring the new city. On the other hand, when Jiten shifted to Singapore, he relied on friends to help him move. His father didn't even cross his mind! Sure, he loves his father and respects him, but as his father was busy with his work, they never developed a friendship.

You may also be interested in:

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Kinshuk.6 years ago
Fathers help in personality development of the kids. Sometimes fathers bring a lot of fun and enjoyment in the lives of their kids.
Geetika chandra.6 years ago
A father plays an important role in the development of the child.He is a role model, an anchor and support. He gives a sense of security. Now as fathers are more involved in kids activities, their importance is more pronounced.
Namitha.10 years ago
the article is good as well as informative. i felt sad because my 4 year old daughter didnt have the fortune to be with her father.when she was only 8 months old we got separated. i am very much worried about it whether this incident would reduce her self esteem. would she accept my point of view when she grows up? god only knows!!!!!
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