Whatwouldyoudoasaparentifyourteenager isgettingbulliedbyhispeers?Learnaboutsomeeffectiveadvicesyoucan givetotheteensonpeerpressureandbullying. Whenbullyingtakesplacethroughpeer pressure,weneedtotakeadequatemeasuressothatourteensareabletodeal withitappropriatelywhenevertheyfaceit.Itisadvisabletobetter acknowledgethefactthatpeer pressureisarealityandnotlivein denialthatithappensonlyincertainplacesandourteensarenotliableto beapartofit.Educationalexpertsandsocialscientistsareoftheopinion thatthemoreweareabletomaketheteenagerawareoftherealityandaspects ofpeerpressureandbullying,thebetterequippedwilltheybeincopingwith it.Hereareafewpointsonhowyoucangoaboutit: Build aStrongRelationshipwithYourKid Buildingastrongrelationshipwithyour kidisthefirstandprimarycoverofprotectionfromthethreatofpeer pressure.Therapportthatyoubuildwithyourkidwillenablehimto communicatefreelywithyouandyouwillbethefirstpersonthatthekidwill thinkofapproachingwhenheorshefacesadoubtorwantstoanswertoany query. Adolescenceisagrowthstagewheretheteenager isgoingthroughalotofphysicalandemotionalchangesandisthusthemost vulnerable.Thisiswhytheygetbulliedsoeasilyandalsoengagein potentiallyharmfulbehaviour astheyareinahurryandfeelanurgeto‘know’andexperiencethings.Bea parentwithwhomthekidcansharehisconfusions,thoughtsandqueries,a personwhomtheteenagercantrustandconfide.Inthiswayyouwillhavea betterunderstandingoftheteenagerandalsoknowifheisunderanysortof peerpressurethreat. Build Discipline Chartoutadiscipline regimenforeverymemberofthefamily.Theteenagershouldnotbemadetofeel thatheissingularlytargetedorhauledupforfollowingrules.Thereshould beasetofregulationstobefollowedbyeveryoneinthefamily.Thiswill helpthekidconditionhimselftoapositiveenvironment,andrememberthat thereshouldbearightbalanceofdisciplineandrecreationinyourchart.The kidmustnotfeelstifledasthenhemightseekrefugeincertainundesirable activitiesproposedbyhispeergroup. Seek YourKid’sOpinion Involvetheteenagerinallimportant decisionmakingthatisforthefamily.Thiswillmakethekidfeelinvolved andnotneglectedorleftout.Itisoftenduetothefeelingofinsecurity thatkidsbecomebullies orfallvictimtobullying.Allowthekidtoofferhischoicesastothetype ofdress,food,recreationalactivitythathewouldprefer.Ifyouhavea betterideaorfeelthatthesaidchoiceisnotgoodfortheteenager,putit acrossasasuggestionandnotasanimposition.Explainclearlythereasonfor yourchoice,youwillfindthattheteenager wouldmoreoftenthanagreewithyourdecisionwillingly. Build SelfEsteemintheKid Thisisafollow-throughoftheabove pointas,onceyouarehelpingthekiddecide,hewillalsogetaconfidence boostthatwhateverheisdoingintermsofhabits,appearanceandactivities isjusttherightthingforhim.Hewillbelesspronetoacceptthedictates ofabullyingpeergroupthatheneedstoconformtoadifferentsetofvalues orideas.Hisinnerselfconfidencewillactasaneffectiveshield. Finally,youmustretainyourcalmness andbepatientatalltimes.Ifandwhenyougettoknowthatthekidis gettingbulliedbyhispeers,donotloseyourcool.Expressyourloveand affectionandhelpthekidunderstandthatyouareconcernedabouthis well-being.Ifthekidhasfallenintotheringofapeergroupasavictimor turnsabully,donotlethimfeelthatheisanylesslovedforthis.Your approachwillpermeateintotheteenagerandhelphimovercometheinfluenceof thepeergroupandhewilleventuallycomeacross.
What would you do as a parent if your teenager
is getting bullied by his peers? Learn about some effective advices you can
give to the teens on peer pressure and bullying.
When bullying takes place through peer
pressure, we need to take adequate measures so that our teens are able to deal
with it appropriately whenever they face it. It is advisable to better
acknowledge the fact that peer
pressure is a reality and not live in
denial that it happens only in certain places and our teens are not liable to
be a part of it. Educational experts and social scientists are of the opinion
that the more we are able to make the teenager aware of the reality and aspects
of peer pressure and bullying, the better equipped will they be in coping with
it. Here are a few points on how you can go about it:
Build
a Strong Relationship with Your Kid
Building a strong relationship with your
kid is the first and primary cover of protection from the threat of peer
pressure. The rapport that you build with your kid will enable him to
communicate freely with you and you will be the first person that the kid will
think of approaching when he or she faces a doubt or wants to answer to any
query.
Adolescence is a growth stage where the teenager
is going through a lot of physical and emotional changes and is thus the most
vulnerable. This is why they get bullied so easily and also engage in
potentially harmful behaviour
as they are in a hurry and feel an urge to ‘know’ and experience things. Be a
parent with whom the kid can share his confusions, thoughts and queries, a
person whom the teenager can trust and confide. In this way you will have a
better understanding of the teenager and also know if he is under any sort of
peer pressure threat.
Build
Discipline
Chart out a discipline
regimen for every member of the family. The teenager should not be made to feel
that he is singularly targeted or hauled up for following rules. There should
be a set of regulations to be followed by everyone in the family. This will
help the kid condition himself to a positive environment, and remember that
there should be a right balance of discipline and recreation in your chart. The
kid must not feel stifled as then he might seek refuge in certain undesirable
activities proposed by his peer group.
Seek
Your Kid’s Opinion
Involve the teenager in all important
decision making that is for the family. This will make the kid feel involved
and not neglected or left out. It is often due to the feeling of insecurity
that kids become bullies
or fall victim to bullying. Allow the kid to offer his choices as to the type
of dress, food, recreational activity that he would prefer. If you have a
better idea or feel that the said choice is not good for the teenager, put it
across as a suggestion and not as an imposition. Explain clearly the reason for
your choice, you will find that the teenager
would more often than agree with your decision willingly.
Build
Self Esteem in the Kid
This is a follow-through of the above
point as, once you are helping the kid decide, he will also get a confidence
boost that whatever he is doing in terms of habits, appearance and activities
is just the right thing for him. He will be less prone to accept the dictates
of a bullying peer group that he needs to conform to a different set of values
or ideas. His inner self confidence will act as an effective shield.
Finally, you must retain your calmness
and be patient at all times. If and when you get to know that the kid is
getting bullied by his peers, do not lose your cool. Express your love and
affection and help the kid understand that you are concerned about his
well-being. If the kid has fallen into the ring of a peer group as a victim or
turns a bully, do not let him feel that he is any less loved for this. Your
approach will permeate into the teenager and help him overcome the influence of
the peer group and he will eventually come across.
