Parents of Schoolgoers  Discussion Forum

Hello friends,
I have been silent reader of this board for quite some time.I always tried to find solution from others sujjestion.Today i need sujjestion on my own question.I am elder daughter to my parents we dont have brothers to support our family my parnts are also getting old tell me friends who will take care of our parents?I always feel insecure as my husband is not very much bothered about my parents and i know i cannot expect him to be caring towrds my parents.If my MIL is unwell she will TAKE rest and not do any work but if my mom is unwell she still has to do her own work..My dad has to still run around like young chap for every little things..What im trying to find is till wen is this going to continue dont u all think its unfairr?please correct me if i think wrong..My husband will inform and do each and evry thing to his parents where as he is not even bothrd to call up my parents atleast once in a blue moon just to know how they r doing..Where as he expects me to take care of his parents every moment.Friends tell me why this diffrence and we have to tolerate this just becoz we r born female.I have to think twice before i stay with my parents coz permmision not granted alwayss.When ever i serve my mil i think of my mother whom i never cared before marraige i feel jeolous wen my mil ,husbnd every body tries to derive maximum work from me in retrn i have to have their permission for everything..And they also keep telling tht house belongs to them..I explained my husbnd tht my family need his support my mothr is also very fond of him coz she always wntd to have atleast one son..but he doesnt care.All he is bothered is HIS PARENTS.Daughter inlaw expections are something out of imaginary she is always expected to be goddess..where as son in law can be there worst part but still they should be respected.I know im sounding stupid but i wnt to express myself and take all of your precious sujjestion. riya replied. i could understand your problem
you know it is indian concept that bahu\" s dutied are defined and no son in law duty no where has been ever defined, but time is changing some man\" s are very rational while some are not
but you have never to forgive that u r daughter and you have to take care of your parents
tell them either directly or indirectly that you have to supprt your family also if your parents are living in same city then decide one or two days of week for them and communicate it to your parents and inlaws
ask your hubby to accompany you during your visit.tell him clearly that relationship are give and take
you are taking care of his family for his sake so he should also not to equal extent but also to do something for your parents
gradually if this trend continues you urself would not able to do things whole heartly
things shouls always be clear as crystal never fear from any body if you are right man
stand up it is your duty to take care of your parents who are growing old day by day they need your love man.
you have frank discussion with your hubby try to speak to him
i know he may try to ignore your views but doonot give up try again and again
never fight talk decently
ask him to imagine if he was not there for his perents how they would have felt rest depends on husband to husband
but even if your ils family doonot support you have to be firm and decide your days for your parents and tell it to your ils family
if your ils doonot mind you can ask your parents to saty with you when they feel low