Parents of Schoolgoers  Discussion Forum

we are expecting our first and have chosen a western first name for him with the indian last name (my wife is not indian). this is causing a lot of anxiety with my parents who insist on coming up with a unique indian name for them to address him by. it is getting really annoying because they claim \";grandparents prerogative\";. i've told them that as the kid's parents we've chosen a name that they have to respect even if it named after the other grandparent. no luck and therefore an impasse.

what makes it harder is that my wife really likes my parents but does not call them ma/dad or variants like an indian DIL would.

i want to avoid all this arguing just as the babies are born and have my parents accept the names even if they hard for them to pronounce.

any advice appreciated Archie replied. Dear Sanjay,
I think Meena and Ritika made a wonderful suggestion on name part to you.

I would say let you both footdown that your parents must respect name you two choose for baby. You two should get more priority as it's your baby. Imagine if your Parents-in-laws too have preference to some name you two will find it hard to cope up with.

You can suggest your wife to call your parents like ma/dad to please, but believe it or not that's not from heart. This is not part of her culture and if she takes it easily it's OK but forcing or making her follow is not wise.

Good luck
Archie meena replied. Maybe u could keep an indian western name...u know a name that is Indian as well as western like ..Jai(Jay)or Neil (neel) etc...check indian name books for more.
As for u'r wife calling u'r parents ma/dad....maybe u can request her to call them that or some other variation just to please them (it is in our culture to do that....it's not as if u r expecting her to change her religion but just accept part of your culture.) maybe this will please u'r parents and they will back off the name issue.
Why I say this is beacuse i have a friend whose daughter got married to an American guy and when he called her by her first name she felt really hurt. She accepeted him as part of the family and he is a great guy...but to Indian people small things like that r important.
Since u'r wife already likes u'r family...maybe it wouldn't be so bad for her to do that..it would infact help future relations.

Anyway..all the best with the baby ...and the naming Ritika replied. You could look at having two names. Abroad it is very common. Like \";Neel Aditya \"; and your surname. Keeping all happy.