Parents of Schoolgoers  Discussion Forum

Hi everybody,

Everyday we are reading all sad stories on board. I would like to share my happy story with you all today. This is to tell every body that there are still Good Inlaws ans SIL.

I am married 8 years back and now with 7 year old kid. My marriage took place without my in laws acceptance and presense, only with my parents acceptance and presense. But when I was carrying 6 months they took us to their home only on one condition that there will not be any relation between two families of myparents and in-laws (I & my H are at liberty to go). My MIL took care of my child for the first 1.5 years. As the child was growing naughty we kept him in day care. We used to visit their house every weekend (as we both are working). She used to cook for us what all we like.

It is not that we never had any misunderstandings. We had, but now I realise that was all because of my immeturity and not knowing their culture. I don' t have brothers at home. I was bought up like a boy at home. Used take my own decisions on whatever I want and get the outside works on my own. Never had a culture at my home to approach elders for making small decisions. This continued even after my marriage. This made my in-laws unhappy. Now I realise, what and how I made them unhappy.

Now I know their wavelengths, I keep quite even if she says something to me. I think that is all for my good being only. I only think that if my mother is in this position she also says the same. My FIL is 60 years, he still works. He wants to earn for their old age. My SIL never interferes in our family matters. She is settled in US. My in-laws are in africa as my FIL is working there on an assignment for two years. I am eagarly waiting for them to come back.

I really feel that I am blessed with Good in-laws.

My final word to everybody is, I don' t denay that in-laws are bad sometimes. Look at your behaviour before you name them bad.

BYE.
disturbed replied. Your parents much be so proud to know they worked hard to raise a daughter who willingly forfeits everything they have done for those who will never have their childs best interests at heart.

You may be blessed with \" Good In Laws\" for as long as you bow to their wishes. As for your true family, perhaps they are better off with out such a shallow and mecurial daughter.
One can only hope your child does not grow up to be anything like you! SR replied. Hi

All I can say is ' good for you'
I personally would not agree to this sort of a relationship.
I' d want my inlaws to respect my parents. Exactly the same way as my husband would want me to respect his parents.

romi replied. You do not have to put up with inlaws 24 chours! That is the real reason for your happiness. Do you think you could be happy having them live with you and bar your parents from visiting you?
Anyway your story only goes to prove how relationships can be maintained by maintaining the right distance.
I think most women on this board are only trying to say the same thing. No stands to gain anything by breaking relationships. But no one stands to gain anything by forcing people to live together too! romi replied. I guess with such good inlaws you must be waiting eagerly for them to move in with you and multiply your happiness!
And your parents must be even more happy that they can never visit their happy daughter ever again!
Anyway good wishes to you and others who want to seek this \" happiness\" at any cost!
Minka replied. Hi ,

Nice to hear this for a change. But how do you handle functions where your both families have to get together - your son' s birthday' s or some significant function like that. Are you OK with your parents being sidelined in your son' s life ?

Kudos to you for being so adjustable. I know I wouldn' t do the same if I were in your place. I would rather stay on my own and live life on my own terms