My mil is here from past two months and she is a pain in the neck. She has her own way of doing things and criticizing each and everything I do. Like she loves eating oily n fried things. So she loves cooking food with lot of oil and ghee. If I tell her not to use tons of oil then she gets mad and indirectly comments. I don't like having pooris or parathas at 7:00 in the morning for breakfast I just take a slice of bread so she will tell my hubby look ur wife makes me eat bread. Although I have already told her eat what she wants and she can cook whatever she likes. She wont' ask her son to eat fried things but She wants me to eat the same fried and oily things like her. Not only this the whole day she will criticize about how nicely she cooks in India and now she is not allowed to cook the way she wants. I haven't said anything but she notices me using limited oily and avoiding fried things etc. My husband leaves for work and the whole day her attitude drives me crazy. If I tell anything to my hubby he says just ignore its a matter of few more months. But I am just sick of her. Has anyone been in such situtation. Plz help!
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My mil is here from past two months and she is a pain in the neck. She has her own way of doing things and criticizing each and everything I do. Like she loves eating oily n fried things. So she loves cooking food with lot of oil and ghee. If I tell her not to use tons of oil then she gets mad and indirectly comments. I don't like having pooris or parathas at 7:00 in the morning for breakfast I just take a slice of bread so she will tell my hubby look ur wife makes me eat bread. Although I have already told her eat what she wants and she can cook whatever she likes. She wont' ask her son to eat fried things but She wants me to eat the same fried and oily things like her. Not only this the whole day she will criticize about how nicely she cooks in India and now she is not allowed to cook the way she wants. I haven't said anything but she notices me using limited oily and avoiding fried things etc. My husband leaves for work and the whole day her attitude drives me crazy. If I tell anything to my hubby he says just ignore its a matter of few more months. But I am just sick of her. Has anyone been in such situtation. Plz help!
a replied. My dear, i'm sure a lot of other mil are like that, i know mine is. To break my fast of 5 days (given she never fast) made pooris and fried eggplant in the morning, which made me throw up. She though i threw up to insult her. But since she doesn't fast, she doesn't know what the proper way to break a fast is. For breakfast, same thing, like milk and cereal -- they got angry at me saying we don't like having same thing each morning. So how to deal with it.
1. Have what you think is right for your body. Tell her you appreciate her making all this \";nice\"; food, and that you'll have it later in the day, now you just want some bread. Be clear and direct. then later, dil rakhne ke liye, just have a small bite.
2. Try to explain to her that the foods that work in india, don't work here. Example, here we don't walk, sweat as much as people in India due to the weather/climate difference. If we don't eat accordingly, we'll end up in a hospital having open heart surgeries. also, say that because you live here your metabolism has changed.
So don't let her drive you crazy. YOu have to just be firm in what you want. Slowly, the more you tell her, she'll stop, or do it less frequently. Also, when a comment gets passed, just ignore it, and don't let it get to you. It's just difference in opinion and lifestyle.
It's difficult, but after a while, they know that they can't force their ways on you and they stop.
Good luck.
2006-08-18
#1
Name: a Subject: you are not alone
My dear, i'm sure a lot of other mil are like that, i know mine is. To break my fast of 5 days (given she never fast) made pooris and fried eggplant in the morning, which made me throw up. She though i threw up to insult her. But since she doesn't fast, she doesn't know what the proper way to break a fast is. For breakfast, same thing, like milk and cereal -- they got angry at me saying we don't like having same thing each morning. So how to deal with it.
1. Have what you think is right for your body. Tell her you appreciate her making all this \";nice\"; food, and that you'll have it later in the day, now you just want some bread. Be clear and direct. then later, dil rakhne ke liye, just have a small bite.
2. Try to explain to her that the foods that work in india, don't work here. Example, here we don't walk, sweat as much as people in India due to the weather/climate difference. If we don't eat accordingly, we'll end up in a hospital having open heart surgeries. also, say that because you live here your metabolism has changed.
So don't let her drive you crazy. YOu have to just be firm in what you want. Slowly, the more you tell her, she'll stop, or do it less frequently. Also, when a comment gets passed, just ignore it, and don't let it get to you. It's just difference in opinion and lifestyle.
It's difficult, but after a while, they know that they can't force their ways on you and they stop.
Good luck.
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