Parents of Schoolgoers  Discussion Forum

hi everyone
here i am with a very new problem. recently i moved from states to canada. my family is in canada. so i visited them , obviously very very excited. the response which i got from my sis and bhabi was not really good. they make ateam and treat me really like a shit. right now i am settling and still dont haver proper furniture an all but the way they treat me as if i am very poor , they both are well settled, but it really hurt me when i see my own sis indirectly insulting me. tell me what to do, how to maintain respectable relations with them. on the other hand my brother and mother they both treat me really good. so please tell me what to do, i am feeling really hurt.
a replied. Hi Sonia,
I am sorry to hear that your own family is treating you poorly. I know from personal experience how it feels when you own family makes insulting comments. The good thing you have is at least your mother and your brother are treating you right. Just treasure that. Have nice relations with your mother and brother. Your sister and your bhabhi -- if they make an insulting comment, just stand up for yourself, talk back to them, firmly, pointing out that they have said something that is not right. Main thing, do not let their insulting comments get to you. just keep your head up high. if someone can be so low to make a insulting comment on one's sister (or sil), then it is not worth your time and emotional attention, direct that energy towards positive relationship (ma & bhai). Over time they will realize how they are wrong, and they may or may not change, but it shouldn't be your worry. You should only keep emotionally distant formal relationship with them.
example -- if they say something about you not having furniture -- say something like -- people aren't born with furniture nor is it necessary like air and water is for living. With time it will come. I have other better priorities in life than to worry about what material things i have in my house.
when it is family, it hurts, but it'll be fine. just don't let it get to you. look at the bright side -- you are with your mom -- why let stupid things take away from enjoying that.
Good luck. I'm sure it'll be fine.