Parents of Schoolgoers  Discussion Forum

Hi all,
Just going thru everyone's messages... thought of gaining some advice from you all...
Mine was a love marriage with lot of struggle from my in-laws .. they had this problem of Caste .. i.e. they were Brahmins and I was a non-brahmin. After my husband convincing them they agreed and we got married. but with lots of hardships we got married... I stay in Thane and my SIL stays in dombivli. This house also was bought with only one condition that my SIL is near to us

From the time we got married.. she always demands that we should visit her place once or twice in a month.. if we dont go to their place they come to our place... I was totally fed up with this.. I and my hubby both work and we have only the weekends to be together as he always comes 11pm in the night when it is sleeping time... hardly we get to talk to each other...and she always tries to teach that we should be in touch and call each other. everyday .I used to do this earlier and now recently have stopped calling her up. when there was fight in our house because of her. My parents also stay in the same complex where we stay they moved after my marriage because my father use to not keep well and my younger bro is in U.S. so my parents responsibility was on my shoulders. My father was a cancer patient.. they SIL and her husband helped in father's illness when he was hospitalized .. I did not ask any help from they came forward and helped us.After some days they happen to come to my house,... since my father was not well I went to stay at my father's house.. she made a big issue out of that in the morning. When she came actually I made some face I mean I used to not like her anyways
She told why you went to ur father's place when we are here Whenever she use to come she use to leave her clothes I had put her clothes in the bed ..I.e. the in bed which has storage place. She got angry on that.. My husband said you leave the house just now
He always tells this
She is a pain in my infact all of my in-laws are pain in my life.. Some times I feel like doing a suicide but I have so many responsibilities.. I have a daughter my mother is there.. my father expired recently.. my husband has even caught my legs for his sister.. so I think
He will never change .. yday also he wanted to go to his sis's place I said you want to go you go I will not come.. she has not invited me
For that also he starting shouting at me.
Can you all help me in getting RID of this problem.. Please do not tell me to compromise with her.. I cannot stand her however good she becomes..
unlucky replied. Girl, you really are very jealous and possessive, I wish I had a sil like yours. Mine has not spoken to me ever since I got married. She does not help me but takes all opportunities to destroy all relationships between me and my mil. swati replied. Sorry dear,If it hurts you...But it's time to realise urself.Probably she is not that bad (Though she might be not good).I felt Vanya is correct in saying \";If your brother was not in states & stayed nearby I am sure you would have liked to meet them\";.After all u grown up together sharing all family matters.


Because ,all she wants is good relation ship with her brother and u.

Tell me,Is she making any advantage over her brother's love and respect to her?! I meant ...Is she expecting him to sponser her kids education or buying her precious gifts ...etc...

If that is not the case,U plz trust her and TRY HARD to change ur mind set.
I understand it's bitter advise which u r not able to digest.But u have only this option.

This is not called compromsiing.It's just matter of being good with ur SIL.

Decide well ,Dear.Tell ur hubby to keep u observed and u r going to treat her well now onwards.This will bringa great happiness to him.MAke him happy dear! He is ur hubby and u need his support entire life.


Someday, u will be the owner of ur family and u both will be busy woth daughter's responsibilities.Then,you'll not even find time to fight with hubby over ur SIL. vanya replied. Geeta
Just read your mail again assuming that its by someone else.What impression does it make?What i can see is you have streaks of ingratitude.If someone helps ,you just have this much to say `I didn't ask for it'On the other hand your sil seems to be a fairly matured woman who inspite of ure behaviour is still inviting you over ,who wholeheartedly helped you when your father was not well.
Sorry to hear about ure father Are you sure you are not depressed by it Believe me its not such a big issue to make you land up into suicidal ideas There are definitely other compounding factors or ure being childish
If ure brother was not in states & stayed nearby I am sure you wud have liked to meet them.Dont sour a relation