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You are here : home > Teen Issues > Dating > Girls and Your Son

Girls and Your Son

If parents start taking interest in child’s love life, child will not hesitate to take advice from parents rather than taking advice from friends. Read on to understand the psychology of a male teenager. 

As most parents of teenagers know, once your children enter their teens, a large part of their discussions - and life - is likely to center around the opposite sex. This is often a time of anxiety for parents, who want their children to concentrate on their studies and on non-hormonal extra-curricular activities.

While parents tend to be more liberal towards their sons, some still don't encourage the idea of their sons going out, dating or having girlfriends. The main reason for this worry seems to be that they don't want distractions to interfere with their son's studies. Parents who lay strong emphasis on education especially seem to be of this mentality.

Although this worry is not completely unfounded, there are various ways to cope with it.

Don't discourage your children from indulging in romantic, lovey-dovey thoughts. Romantic fantasies are very much a part of being a teenager, and if you discourage such fantasies, your child will simply shy away from you. Instead, you should work at encouraging your child to discuss their problems with you. If you think by discouraging such thoughts your children will not indulge in them, think again. Your child will just turn to the phone and pour his heart out to his friends.

Although you lay no importance to the fact that your son's crush has started going out with another boy, it means the world to your son and he is indeed probably crushed. To wave away his feelings and demand that he concentrate on his studies would be to simply deny the issue, and it means that your son has one less person to talk to. You, as a parent, are the biggest support system for your child. The reason teenagers don't discuss their problems with their parents is because they feel their parents would not understand. If you do start taking an interest in your child's love life or lack of one, you will find that your child will start confiding a lot more in you, and he will not hesitate before coming to you for advice. And wouldn't you rather he takes your advice than the advice of his friend?

More conservative parents of sons often make the mistake of putting down the girls their son mixes with. Although these parents let their sons go out at night for dinners or parties, they wouldn't let their daughters out at night. So they often put down the girls who accompany their sons to these parties or dinners.

It would do parents good to remember that these girls are friends of your son. They probably help your son with his studies and vice versa, cry when they do badly in an exam, and are working towards some goal or the other, just like your son is. Bad-mouthing them will not make your son stop hanging out with them. It will only make your child think of you as conservative and as someone with who he cannot relate.

You may also be interested in:

Dating Rules for Teens
Teenagers and Dating
The First Crush
Girls and Your Son
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cash.7 years ago
Yes, I agree with this author. I took your advice, and allowed my son to watch prime time TV (which was a bad choice), since after watching reruns of dirty american shows (baywatch, hannah montana) he is on a flight to California in search of a "hot blond wife". I don't know what to do with myself, I cry every night... WHY CAN'T HE BE HAPPY WITH THE GIRL WE HAVE CHOSEN?! We even dyed her hair blond... it didn"t work.
sittu.9 years ago
very interesting article. i was wondering if i should travel. will speak to my doctor about it.
Rameeta.9 years ago
my son has just become friendly with girls. i was becoming a little worried but now i will just take it easy. thanks for the article.
Nimesh.9 years ago
i'm a 15 year old guy and this is exactly how i feel. my parents are not supportive of me at all when it comes to girls. all they care about is me studying. me studying is the only thing on their brains. and guess what? i barely talk to them. they would never understand what it's like to be a boy growing up in america. your aricle hit the nail on the head. thank you for writing such a great article.
Kamakazi.9 years ago
dude your competely right.
kp.9 years ago
as an american 17 year old boy.. this article is correct in how it portrays teenager viewpoints.. great job to the author..
Babitha.9 years ago
excellent indeed.
my 14 yr olddaughter and myself are more like frnds rather than mm and daughter. we share everything from boyfrnds to periods to you name it we share, even about my old boyfriends at home befor ei got married.
its actually trust and understanding, not shouting, yelling or punishing. remember.
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