Theworldweliveinisalwaysinarush,uncaringofthewhirlwinditcreates.Theresultisthatwehavetoliveinbarelystructuredchaos.Weareconstantlyambushedbynoise,bothphysicalandmentalnoise.Wedon’treallyrealisetheamountofphysicalnoiseweareinuntilwemovetoaplacethatissilent.Thethingis,ifyouhavelivedinacityforanyamountoftime,yourealiseyoudevelopathresholdagainstthisbackgroundnoise.Andwhileyoumayhaveadevelopedatolerancefortheselevelsofnoise,pushingittothebackofyoursubconscious,thesenoisesstillaffectyourcognitiveandmentalhealth.Youmightnotactivelyrealiseit,buteventhesebackgroundnoisesthatyoupushtothebackstillgetprocessedbyyoursensoryorgansandthebrain.Thereisstillasignificantamountofenergythatgoesintodealingwiththisnoisethatyouoftendon’tevenrealiseyouareexpending.Theoutcomesaredetrimentaltobothyourcognitivefunctionsandmentalpeace.Youfindyourselfhavingalowerandlowerattentionspan,andhavetroublewithmemoryandproblem-solving.Theseproblemsmaynotbeveryvisibleatfirstbuteventuallymaystartbotheringyou.Don’tpanic,yourbrainhasn’tsuddenlybecomeslow,itisjustfatigued.Samewithmentalhealth,thisconstantnoisecanbeexhaustingtoputupwith,andleadtoalotofdemotivation.Mentalnoiseisthechaosofthoughtsthateruptinourheadswhenweoverthinksomething.Andunfortunately,nowadaysweoverthinkeverything.Yougotothesupermarkettopickupgroceriesandyouoverthinkwhetherornotyouneedsomething,whetherwhatyouarepickinguphasanychemicalsthatmaybeharmfultoyou,whetheritisecofriendly.Thatwasjustanexample,butitistruethatthemorechoiceswehavethemorewetortureourselvesovereachandeveryoneofthem.Andintheconsumeristicworldweliveintoday,wehavemoreoptionsthanweknowwhattodowith.Wealsooverthinkaboutsocialrelations,thoughtlike“whatdidhemeanwhenhesaidthis?”or“shouldIhavedonethat?”or“howwillmyactionsbeinterpreted?”.Eveninourcareers,wetendtoclutterourmindswithunnecessarythoughts-second-guessingourdecisions,wequestiontheresultswegetandkeepaskingourselvesifthereisanythingwecandotomoveupthecareerladder.Thebottomlineisthatthereisalotofmentalnoise,anoverloadofthoughtsrunningthroughourmindatanytime,andevenmorefrustratingisascenariowherementalnoiseandphysicalnoiseintervene.Ifyouareinanoisyenvironmentandthinking(overthinking)aboutsomething,sometimesyoucan’tevenhearyourownthoughts.Oftensuchnoisecanreachaboilingpointandspilloverintheformofanoutburst.Wedon’twanttoreachthatpointwhereeverythinggetsoverwhelminganddrainsus.Unfortunately,wecannotescapetheworld,wecannotescapethisnoise.Butwecanfindwaystoincorporatesilenceandpeaceintoourlivessothatwecanefficientlytacklethenoisewehavetofaceotherwise.Herearesomewayswecanfindquietandpeaceamidstthenoiseofourlives-1)Findtimetosurroundyourselfwithquiet.Ifyouliveinacity,andinametropolitancityatthat,itcanbehardtofindquietandpeace.Butharddoesnotmeanimpossible.Findwaystospendsometimeinthequiet.Manypeoplepreferstartingtheirdayearlybeforetheworldhaswokenupfortheirs.Earlymorningsdotendtobequiet,evenifpeoplehavewokenupnotalotofpeoplewillwanttostepoutimmediately.Soawalkbeforethesunhascompletelyrisentotheskywouldbeaverygoodwaytoorganiseyourthoughtsandprepareyouforthedayaheadofyouinpeace.Itwillhelpyouthinkclearly,asthereislittletonophysicalnoise,aswellasyourbrainisfreshfromaperiodofrest.Andyouarenotpulledintoastormofsocialandprofessionaldemandsaswell,becauseitisunlikelyanyonewouldbotheryouthisearly.AbonusforsuchmorningsseemstobethattheyarecoolinatropicalcountrylikeIndiawhichisusuallyswelteringinthemiddleoftheday.Earlymorningwalkswillalsoputyouinahealthyscheduleasthesooneryoustartwithyourday,thesooneryouaredonewithyourresponsibilitiesandyouarelikelytogotobedearlier.Butthismightnotworkforeveryone.Andeveryonehasdifferentschedulestoo.Forsomepeople,itmightbeeasiertofindtimeforquietaftertheyhavefulfilledtheirdutiesfortheday,andsitdownwithabookandteaforanhourbeforetheygotobed.Forother,maybeawalkintheparkneartheirhouseafterworkandbeforetheyhavetogohometomoreresponsibilitieshelpsthemfindtheirpeace.Forsomeothers,itcouldbegoingtoalibraryandspendingtimebeinglostintheirfavouritefictionorlearningaboutsomethingthatintereststheminsilence.Ormaybeyoucouldgotoyourfavouritebookstore,theverysmellofbooksandthesilencethatoftenaccompaniesbookstorescansootheyou.Somepeoplealsoliketogotocafésandworkthereinpeaceasitisunlikelyanyonewillapproachyouthere,giveneveryoneisimmersedintheirownwork,andthesubtlenoisesofpeoplearoundyoustopitfrombeingtooeerie.Museumsandartgalleriesarealsoexcellentwaystosubmergeyourselfinsilenceandletyourthoughtsrunfree.Itdoesn’tmatterhow,itjustmattersthatyoufindthetimetospendinsilence.2)DisconnectWiththeleapsandboundstechnologyseemstobetakingeveryfewmonths,andwithhowthisadvancebleedsintoourdailylivesaswell,weareconstantly“pluggedin”.Evenwhenwearenotactivelyonlineoronthenet,weareconstantlymetwithabarrageoftexts,alerts,notificationsandemails.Wearemoreaccessiblethanever,andweareconstantlywithinthereachoffriends,familyandouremployers.Whilethatisexcellenttokeepintouchwhenyoucannotbewiththeminperson,italsokeepsyouconstantlyonguardevenifjustsubconsciously. Wedonotgetthetimetobeourselves,justourselvesasopposedtobeingourselvesinthecontextofothers.Withothers,evenwhilebeingourmostgenuineandauthenticselves,wedoadjustourbehaviouralittletoensurethatsocialsituationsgobysmoothly.Itcangetexhausting,andyouwillneedsometimeawayfromthat.Sotryanddisconnectforawhile.Maybegoawayforaweekendeverymonthandalerteveryoneclosetoyouthatyouwillbeofflineandtheycancallyouinanemergencysituation,andswitchoffyouremailsandnotifications,andspendthattimeinsilence,awayfromthenoiseoftheworld.Ifthissoundstoodrastic,youcansetatimeofmaybe1hour(ormore,whateverworksforyou)everydaywhereyoukeepyourphoneasideanddon’tcheckit.3)Reconnectwithyourself.Youhavefoundtimetodisconnectyourselffromtheworld,great.Nowwhat?Well,rememberhowwesaidthisnoisethatweexperienceeverydayintheformofphysicalandmentalnoisecancloudourthoughts?Well,wecanworkonthat.Reconnectingwithyourselfinvolvesbeingintunewithyourself.Itmightseemalittleabsurd,youmighteventhinkofcourseweareintunewithourselves,orIknowwhatIthinkbecauseI’mtheonethinkingthem.Fairpoints,butwhatImeanhereisintrospectionandhoningyourself-awareness.Forsome,thiscanbestructuredorguidedmeditationoryoga.Forsomeothers,simplytakingafewdeepbeatsinaquietroomcanhelpthemrefocusandofferclarityintotheirownthoughts.Journalingisalsoanexcellentwaytocatchyourthoughtsandexpressthemandmighthelpyouputintowordssomethingsyoudidn’tevenknowyouwerethinkingorfeeling.Whateverworksforyouandfeelsrightislikelytobethebestapproachandtheoneyoushouldgoaheadwith. Whateverthemethodmaybe,itneedstobesimpletoimplementtoensureyoudoitfrequentlyanditdoesn’tturnintoanothertaskinyourdailyschedulethatyouneedtobedonewith.Remember,itisforyou.Itneedstobesomethingyoulookforwardto(whichishighlylikelyonceyourealisehowgooditfeelstobeintouchwithyourself)forittoturnintoahabit. Youneedtofocusonyou.4)GoOfftheGridThisisamoreintenseversionofthesuggestioninapreviouspoint.Whiletheotherpointsweremorefocusedonthelittlethingsyoucandoeveryday,afewtweakshereandthereinyourusuallifestyle,thissuggestioninvolvessteppingoutofit.Here,weencourageactuallytakingyourselfcompletelyoutoftheenvironmentyouareusedtoandseekoutsomequietandcalmawayfromit.Sometimescorporations,orrathertheHRdepartmentsofthesecorporations,organiseretreats.Wellsomethingsimilartothis,butyouorganiseitforyourself.Takesometimeoff,goofftoaresortforastayandspendtimeinthespapamperingyourself,joinamindfulnessbootcamp.Itcouldalsobetimeyoutakeofftoexplorenature,gohiking.Itcouldalsobetovisitsomeplacesyouhavebeenwantingtovisitforawhilenow.Evenifitmayseemcheesy,youdeservean“Eat.Pray.Love”stylevacation,simplybecauseithelps.Theentirepointofthisisyouhavesometimetochill,kickback,forgetyourresponsibilitiesforalittlewhile,andenjoyalifedevoidofothersexpectations.Youjustneedtofindsomewherethatwillprovideacontrasttoyourusualenvironment,sothatyourbraincanswitchtovacationmodeandrelax.Itisunderstandablethatwecannotsuddenlytakeabreak,andthiswouldrequireatleastsomeamountofplanning,butdon’tputitoffanddon’twaitforthe“right”time.5)LearntoshutdowneverythingthatdoesnotrequireyourattentionThisiseasiersaidthandone,butitispossible.Itisaskill,whichmeansyoucanimproveonitthemoreyoupractice.Asidealasitwouldbeforustosimplyfindquietanddisconnect,sometimesthingsdon’tworkoutthewaywewantthemto.Youmayworkajobthatdoesnotgiveyouenoughholidayordoesnotprovidetheconvenienceofbeingawayforafewdaysorbeinginaccessibleforafewhours.Thenoisejustgetsgreaterandgreater.So,howcanwecopewithsuchasituation?Howcanwebuyourselvesenoughtimetocalmdownandre-energizeourselves?Well,wemightnotbeableto,butwhatwecandoisslowtheexhaustionwemaybefacinguntilwecanfindthattime.Wewillhavetotrainourselvestonotbebotheredbythethingsthatdon’tneedourattention,andinsteadfocusonlyonthethingsthatdo.Wecanavoidexpendingenergyonthethingsthatcanbetackledbyothers,insteadredirectingthatenergytowardourtaskandus.Youcanalsodiscourageothersfrombotheringyoubysubtlebodylanguage.Justputtingyourheadsupandgettingonwiththetaskathand,otherswillprobablysensethatyouareimmersedinthetaskandlikelywillnotbotheryou.Ifthatseemsalittletoosubtle,closingthedoortoyourcabin,orswitchingtoamoresilentplacewilldothetrick.Oryoucancasuallyslipitintoaconversationifsomeonestillapproachesyou,butmakesuretonotbeunkindboutitwhichmaycreateamisunderstandingthatwillonlyaddtoyourstress.
The world we live in is always in a rush, uncaring of the whirlwind it creates. The result is that we have to live in barely structured chaos. We are constantly ambushed by noise, both physical and mental noise.
We don’t really realise the amount of physical noise we are in until we move to a place that is silent. The thing is, if you have lived in a city for any amount of time, you realise you develop a threshold against this background noise. And while you may have a developed a tolerance for these levels of noise, pushing it to the back of your subconscious, these noises still affect your cognitive and mental health. You might not actively realise it, but even these background noises that you push to the back still get processed by your sensory organs and the brain. There is still a significant amount of energy that goes into dealing with this noise that you often don’t even realise you are expending. The outcomes are detrimental to both your cognitive functions and mental peace. You find yourself having a lower and lower attention span, and have trouble with memory and problem-solving. These problems may not be very visible at first but eventually may start bothering you. Don’t panic, your brain hasn’t suddenly become slow, it is just fatigued. Same with mental health, this constant noise can be exhausting to put up with, and lead to a lot of demotivation.
Mental noise is the chaos of thoughts that erupt in our heads when we overthink something. And unfortunately, nowadays we overthink everything. You go to the supermarket to pick up groceries and you overthink whether or not you need something, whether what you are picking up has any chemicals that may be harmful to you, whether it is eco friendly. That was just an example, but it is true that the more choices we have the more we torture ourselves over each and every one of them. And in the consumeristic world we live in today, we have more options than we know what to do with. We also overthink about social relations, thought like “what did he mean when he said this?” or “should I have done that?” or “how will my actions be interpreted?”. Even in our careers, we tend to clutter our minds with unnecessary thoughts - second-guessing our decisions, we question the results we get and keep asking ourselves if there is anything we can do to move up the career ladder. The bottom line is that there is a lot of mental noise, an overload of thoughts running through our mind at any time, and even more frustrating is a scenario where mental noise and physical noise intervene. If you are in a noisy environment and thinking (overthinking) about something, sometimes you can’t even hear your own thoughts. Often such noise can reach a boiling point and spillover in the form of an outburst.
We don’t want to reach that point where everything gets overwhelming and drains us. Unfortunately, we cannot escape the world, we cannot escape this noise. But we can find ways to incorporate silence and peace into our lives so that we can efficiently tackle the noise we have to face otherwise. Here are some ways we can find quiet and peace amidst the noise of our lives -
1) Find time to surround yourself with quiet.
If you live in a city, and in a metropolitan city at that, it can be hard to find quiet and peace. But hard does not mean impossible. Find ways to spend some time in the quiet. Many people prefer starting their day early before the world has woken up for theirs. Early mornings do tend to be quiet, even if people have woken up not a lot of people will want to step out immediately. So a walk before the sun has completely risen to the sky would be a very good way to organise your thoughts and prepare you for the day ahead of you in peace. It will help you think clearly, as there is little to no physical noise, as well as your brain is fresh from a period of rest. And you are not pulled into a storm of social and professional demands as well, because it is unlikely anyone would bother you this early. A bonus for such mornings seems to be that they are cool in a tropical country like India which is usually sweltering in the middle of the day. Early morning walks will also put you in a healthy schedule as the sooner you start with your day, the sooner you are done with your responsibilities and you are likely to go to bed earlier.
But this might not work for everyone. And everyone has different schedules too. For some people, it might be easier to find time for quiet after they have fulfilled their duties for the day, and sit down with a book and tea for an hour before they go to bed.
For other, maybe a walk in the park near their house after work and before they have to go home to more responsibilities helps them find their peace.
For some others, it could be going to a library and spending time being lost in their favourite fiction or learning about something that interests them in silence. Or maybe you could go to your favourite bookstore, the very smell of books and the silence that often accompanies bookstores can soothe you. Some people also like to go to cafés and work there in peace as it is unlikely anyone will approach you there, given everyone is immersed in their own work, and the subtle noises of people around you stop it from being too eerie. Museums and art galleries are also excellent ways to submerge yourself in silence and let your thoughts run free.
It doesn’t matter how, it just matters that you find the time to spend in silence.
2) Disconnect
With the leaps and bounds technology seems to be taking every few months, and with how this advance bleeds into our daily lives as well, we are constantly “plugged in”. Even when we are not actively online or on the net, we are constantly met with a barrage of texts, alerts, notifications and emails. We are more accessible than ever, and we are constantly within the reach of friends, family and our employers. While that is excellent to keep in touch when you cannot be with them in person, it also keeps you constantly on guard even if just subconsciously. We do not get the time to be ourselves, just ourselves as opposed to being ourselves in the context of others. With others, even while being our most genuine and authentic selves, we do adjust our behaviour a little to ensure that social situations go by smoothly. It can get exhausting, and you will need some time away from that. So try and disconnect for a while.
Maybe go away for a weekend every month and alert everyone close to you that you will be offline and they can call you in an emergency situation, and switch off your emails and notifications, and spend that time in silence, away from the noise of the world. If this sounds too drastic, you can set a time of maybe 1 hour (or more, whatever works for you) every day where you keep your phone aside and don’t check it.
3) Reconnect with yourself.
You have found time to disconnect yourself from the world, great. Now what? Well, remember how we said this noise that we experience every day in the form of physical and mental noise can cloud our thoughts? Well, we can work on that.
Reconnecting with yourself involves being in tune with yourself. It might seem a little absurd, you might even think of course we are in tune with ourselves, or I know what I think because I’m the one thinking them. Fair points, but what I mean here is introspection and honing your self-awareness.
For some, this can be structured or guided meditation or yoga. For some others, simply taking a few deep beats in a quiet room can help them refocus and offer clarity into their own thoughts. Journaling is also an excellent way to catch your thoughts and express them and might help you put into words some things you didn’t even know you were thinking or feeling. Whatever works for you and feels right is likely to be the best approach and the one you should go ahead with. Whatever the method may be, it needs to be simple to implement to ensure you do it frequently and it doesn’t turn into another task in your daily schedule that you need to be done with. Remember, it is for you. It needs to be something you look forward to (which is highly likely once you realise how good it feels to be in touch with yourself) for it to turn into a habit. You need to focus on you.
4) Go Off the Grid
This is a more intense version of the suggestion in a previous point. While the other points were more focused on the little things you can do every day, a few tweaks here and there in your usual lifestyle, this suggestion involves stepping out of it. Here, we encourage actually taking yourself completely out of the environment you are used to and seek out some quiet and calm away from it.
Sometimes corporations, or rather the HR departments of these corporations, organise retreats. Well something similar to this, but you organise it for yourself. Take some time off, go off to a resort for a stay and spend time in the spa pampering yourself, join a mindfulness boot camp. It could also be time you take off to explore nature, go hiking. It could also be to visit some places you have been wanting to visit for a while now. Even if it may seem cheesy, you deserve an “Eat. Pray. Love” style vacation, simply because it helps. The entire point of this is you have some time to chill, kick back, forget your responsibilities for a little while, and enjoy a life devoid of others expectations. You just need to find somewhere that will provide a contrast to your usual environment, so that your brain can switch to vacation mode and relax.
It is understandable that we cannot suddenly take a break, and this would require at least some amount of planning, but don’t put it off and don’t wait for the “right” time.
5) Learn to shut down everything that does not require your attention
This is easier said than done, but it is possible. It is a skill, which means you can improve on it the more you practice.
As ideal as it would be for us to simply find quiet and disconnect, sometimes things don’t work out the way we want them to. You may work a job that does not give you enough holiday or does not provide the convenience of being away for a few days or being inaccessible for a few hours. The noise just gets greater and greater. So, how can we cope with such a situation? How can we buy ourselves enough time to calm down and re-energize ourselves? Well, we might not be able to, but what we can do is slow the exhaustion we may be facing until we can find that time.
We will have to train ourselves to not be bothered by the things that don’t need our attention, and instead focus only on the things that do. We can avoid expending energy on the things that can be tackled by others, instead redirecting that energy toward our task and us.
You can also discourage others from bothering you by subtle body language. Just putting your heads up and getting on with the task at hand, others will probably sense that you are immersed in the task and likely will not bother you.
If that seems a little too subtle, closing the door to your cabin, or switching to a more silent place will do the trick. Or you can casually slip it into a conversation if someone still approaches you, but make sure to not be unkind bout it which may create a misunderstanding that will only add to your stress.
