Parents of Schoolgoers  Discussion Forum

First of all, I ould like to clarify one thing. I am not a husband whose wife has issues with his parents(as pointed out by a readred in my last post!)
Secondly, I don't claim to be a magician that I can remove all troubles from any relationships. Honestly most cases I deal with, help themselves, they just need a medium to talk to each other and most of the times they talk through thier trubles woth a conseller. (And may be you will be suprized, i have had bitter cases than you and have had sucess! Maybe my clients were more understanding/or it was mere luck!)
Also, I don't think I said something so terrible that people got so angry. Honestly It was my fault to write in the forum as a conselleor. I thought readers come to this forum to find answers and help. But after reading replies to my messages I have realized that most of you come here just to lash out ur feelings. And to relate to all those who are suffering in their relationship with inlaws. One lady replied that she comes here to bitch obout because it gives her happiness..(I guess in this forum or in in joint family forum).So I guess any body giving anykind of advice is not needed. You guys need another battered, bitter and suffering DIl who could set you an eaxample of even worse in-laws than urs so that you could feel pity for her and feel good about urselves.
I totally understand now that your in-laws are really really bad and may be nobody can help you having a better relationship as they are not ready to listen.
I will pary to GOD to give you all peace and happiness in life and relationships.
x replied. Hi Rani,
We don't need a counselor to tell us that all MILs are not bad and all DILs are not good. We all know that. Just try reading replies to the post \";Meri Kahaani\"; by Mrs. Sharma who is a MIL with her own problems.

Nobody comes to this forum because they enjoy bitching. It is something called venting out your anger which is not only healthy but even necessary for your sanity. I would expect that alteast you being a counselor would understand this.

I am one of the early visitors to this forum. I did a lot of web searching to find a forum where someone can understand and share problems faced by an Indian DIL like me. Believe me I DID NOT DO THIS BECAUSE I ENJOY BITCHING. I had no one to talk to about my MIL torturing me and this was affecting my health. What do you tell the tortured and depressed DILs that come to you for help? - \";Thali ek haat se nahi bajti\";? What do you tell them when they express their anger? - \";Stop bitching girl..\";? Well ,this is what you told all the sad and frustrated DILs who came to this forum to find a solution.

What right do you have to tell us that WE DO NOT HAVE ANY RIGHT to talk ill (or bitch in your words) about our MILs in public forums?

As I said earlier, either you are not a counselor but a husband whose wife has issues with her in-laws or you are not a counselor that a tormented DIL like me would want to go to. Since you say that the first possibility is not true, I am sure the second one is. life replied. Dear Rani,

I really appreciate the concern you had in your message for all the so called \";Troubled DIL's\";. Did you ever think that being matured and educated as well as troubled DIL's we are here on the board for solution and help!!!
The scene with most of our houses are MIL having control on FIL (in most of the cases) and mainly on our husband's. So she has support of atleast 2 people where as we are left behind alone. You are lucky to have good inlaws but do u ever considered yourself in our shoes. Giving speech is totally different from undergoing the pain. Let me tell u my own example. My Mom never had good relation with her MIL (my granny) and I always use to tell my mom that what is that she finds so wrong in granny. But when I am undergoing someof the things which my Mom underwent I really know the difference and infact I apologised to my Mom for accusing her in the past!!!!!
All that we are trying to say is we need some solace to our mind to deal with these MIL's and stand for ourselves thats all. You need not look down upon us for that reason. We are also well educated girls but somewhere needing help
Hope this clears Fed up replied. Dear Rani,
If your intention was really to help suffering Dils here, your messages are not helping. Don't you see it is backfiring ? Like augustborn, I disapprove your comments about all the Dils who are tolerating misbehaviour from these so called grown ups.
Sure all of us in this board need help and we can help one another by emotional support. We have gone through enough unnecessary critisism from our inlaws. We don't need any from you.
I am glad you realized it was your fault to post your message in this board. Atleast, we both agree on that!
augustborn replied. Hi Rani,
Though this is an open forum, I really didnot appreciate the tone of your post. To justify/air your opinion, you needn't belittle others.
Lets respect each other and not get carried away by our own importance...

God Bless!