Parents of Schoolgoers  Discussion Forum

hi friends,
i stay with my mil. i like cleanliness and hygiene. My mil is a good cook.but the problem is she doesnt do it cleanly. for eg. if she has to make potatoe bhaji,she will use some potatoes which were boiled 2-3 days ago and kept inthe fridge. if she has to make dahi kadi, she will use some stale dahi to make it. she stores vegetables for so long in the fridge..and may be after 8-10 days or more she may use the same stuff for cooking. i hate this and if i tell her she feels i m trying to teach her how to cook though i m not a good cook as she is. She uses the dirtiest of cloth for sobbing and doesnt change it for months together. i feel hesitant to tell her nor do i feel like touching such a dirty cloth if i have to do some cleaning. we have some good glass crockery stored in our showcase but she has been still using the old steel vessels for last 20 yrs which look so dirty and bad.can anyone tell me how do i explain this to her. Jaya replied. Hi shruti:

This is a delicate issue. As SM has suggested, the best way to deal with this is to get your husband involved. Ask him to tell your MIL nicely that it is better to practice hygiene in the kitchen. And, when your MIL is not in the vicinity, take your husband to the kitchen and show him the dirty cloth that your MIL uses to wipe surfaces. Let him throw it away and put a clean one instead. Also, open the refrigerator and show him the old food that has been there for days. Let him throw those away. When your MIL asks about it later, tell her that your husband came to the kitchen and threw the cloth away since he felt that it was dirty. Also tell her that he thew the old food away from the refrigerator since he felt that they had a bad smell. About the vegetables, try buying them in smaller quantities so that they don't remain in the refrigerator for long. Regarding the glass crockery, you can start using them to store or serve things a few times. If your MIL asks, tell her something like, 'These beautiful bowls and plates and cups are just sitting in the showcase. I just felt like using them.' Gradually, increase their use. Then, you can avoid using the old vessels.

Hope these things help you.

Take care,

Jaya
SM replied. Hi Shruti,
Since this is a delicate issue and you cannot talk abt this directly with ur mil, why not tell your husband to talk to her. Tell your husband politely about those issues and tell him that you want her to use cleanliness in the kitchen for the benefit of all of you. If you have kids, then tell him that you do not want your kids to get ill because of it and kids are all the more sensitive. Im sure your husband will understand. But be sure that he raises this topic with your mil only in a humourous/kind manner or else she'll feel you went behind her back about this issue & complained to your husband. Hope this idea helps. Keep posting if it came of any help to you.