Parents of Schoolgoers  Discussion Forum

Hi,

My S-I-L recently invited her parents to the US as she wanted them to take care of her children. When the children got their summer holidays, they went with their father to India. As she did not want more expenditure during this period, she told her parents (my in-laws) to visit my husband and me. My in-laws then came to visit us though we were not prepared for this unexpected visit. I am married for 3 years and live in the US. My in-laws have not been a major problem in these 3 years. They have tried to be bossy many times but I did not take it too seriously. However, this time they have shown their true colors. From the time they came to visit us here, they had nothing good to say but just criticized everything that we did. They want us to act according to their suggestions. If me and my husband do not do what they say they get angry and get into an argument. They do not even communicate with me in my own house and try to be bossy. My M-I-L is very indifferent towards me especially since my Mom expired a few months back. One night, I heard her slandering about my father and brother who are going through tough times since my Mom's death. When I confronted her, she never even apologized. Now this matter has become so serious to the point that my in-laws dont't talk to me though they are living in my house. My husband being a quiet person does not know what to do? How do I make things better? I have not done anything wrong but their attitude sucks. harj replied. HI! I can sympathise withe your problem. Me and my hwsband live in England and even though my in laws are in India the still manage to cause problems between us. We went over to india last year for the first time after our marriage and they treated me very bad. I have since realised you must stick up for yourself other wise people take advantage. Alot of problems with in laws can be because of money or that they feel you are taking their son away But I always think saas bhi kabhi bahoo thi, and they should understand the abhoos position more but unfortunately this is not the case. Remember you are not alone were all in the same boat. sony replied. Do not worry. In laws are by definition rude and insensitive. How long are they going to stay here ? As long as your husband is with you, you do not have to worry about anything. Just keep quiet. Don't expect your MIL to apologize, that will never happen. Only key to handle them is being indifferent to them. I had a very bad time when my inlaws visited us last year. I miscarried one of my twins. I learned that their attitude will never change. I've stopped calling them on phone. When my husband calls them, I merely say nameste. So just be patient until they leave. All the best.