Parents of Schoolgoers  Discussion Forum

I have 8 years daughter and 2 years son. My daughter doesn't like her younger brother because he troubles her, takes her things, spoils her room and things etc. When he does so she hits him and doesn't behave nicely with him. I keep on explaining her that he doesn't do it purposefuly and he is a baby. We have to teach him nicely...but in vain. I don't see the natural love for younger ones which is normally there esp. in girls. I don't know how to tackle the problem which is there perhaps because the age diff. is a bit more. mom replied. Elder childern tend to get jealous when siblings are born. Irrespective of the age difference big/small parents should try to inculcate love. I will tell you my story. There's a very lttle age difference between me and my sister. I was a jealous green with her for most of my childhood and used to fight or beat her and would not let her be anywhere near me. My parents/family thought me to be aggressive. BUT now in retrospect I feel I was jealous as I had to share mom's love/attention/time when I was too young(1.8 yrs). Had my parents handled it well this situation had'nt arised. But pregnancies are'nt planned in India and parents think they know best. I still blame my parents for that. Do not land in that situation.

EXPLAIN your daughter that siblings shud be best friends. DO NOT yell take it slow. DO NOT expect that a 6 yr old will take care of her brother. Many parents dump younger siblings on elder ones so they can be free. Shower her with love and praise and treat her as you were doing before.
Discipline ur son too and always do not re-iterate that he's small in front of her. I hope this helps. Susmita replied. I have a nine yr old daaughter and a 2and a half year old son. So my kids are of the same age difference as yours.
However both of my kids have grown an excellent bond of love. That is because we taught our daughter that her brother is the closest person that she would ever have in life, when we will no longer be there and it is her responsibility to take care of her little brother as he will do the same when he grows up. Her brother was a gift to her from us. Since we initally were plannin gto have just one child and she was the one who wanted a sibling. We as parents have to inculcate this in their minds otherwise the feeling of jealousy will breed instead of love. Also please make sure you appreciate every little thing your daughter does for your little one and spend a lot of time with her so that she does not feel neglected. Also teach your little one not to mess up. Barney's \";Clean-up\"; song works great. you will have to clean up and sing a million times infront of him and one day, you will see he has stopped his destructive habits. My 2 year old puts back every toy he plays with as soon as he is done since he is rewarded for doing so. Saying \";NO\"; is not a bad idea, it teaches kids to make right choices.