Parents of Schoolgoers  Discussion Forum

not at all...i felt bad...i was not telling u what i believe..my mil keeps on telling me continoiusly...u know that typical standard line...after all i am a mother...i hv gvine birth...n not only her even her friends whn they come they will gv us same lecture....no matter how much my son run after u...he loves me more thatn u...when at home generally not even intentionally if she sees my husband walking behind me ..she will comment look how my son is following her...let her take whever she wants but my son will come to me coz ia m a mother...alll the time ..365 days ...24 hrs we hv listen to lecture...
n touchwood i hv no problem with my in laws at all...we are all 15 ...love to enjoy life...n whn we all relatvies are 2gether...we just hv a blast...
only only prob is my mil...she is not with me..but also with her relatives...4 any get together she has to say something..nasty about some1...or back biting..or taunting...
n how much she has done for her dil...its nothing special for us...just for one person i cant ask my husband to get rid of entire family...n i cant remove my mil..out of my house all alone...so i use to take her non sense...but now i know how to handle her...
my prob was i was only new perosn in family..it takes time to adjust n gain every1 respect ...that time she took full advantage of my situation..i never took any1 advice or told any1 ..coz mine was love mrrg...
if i tell my side about my mil..they wud hv said this is what happens in love mrrg..bla bla..i was sick of that too...
after i met my sil..i am feeling better...she is of my age...nice she is ...atleast i hv company..best thing she is very understanding too.. but she knows how to tackle my mil...she really knows that ...
i tried my best to win my mil...coz again mine was a love mrrg..everytime she wud say in my family no one went for love mrrg ...my sons are never like that i dont know what made my sone go mad after u..?
she wud tell ever1 not to talk to me at home...so many thigs to tell u...
she never let me do anything ..she use to be like u cant take care of 13 members...
then came my bro-in laws mrrg...he too fell in love with this girl...all her big talks..went for a toss...
now other members of my family talk to me properly...previously they wud get scared talking tom e in front of my mill....
all i can say my stars were bad thats it...that i gv up...
now her situation is sit quietly in one corner...n keep thinking bad about us ..now also she continues talking ..but i dont pay any attention to her...after sometime she beocmes alright....
talking about girls side parents..then plsssssssss.........
once she draged my mother ...she said something bad about her...i clld my husband he was at off..i said if u want to spent rest of ur life with me u will come home right now........my bro in lw...n other relatives...n created a big huge scene..that was just small thing i got in my hand...i told everything to all her relatives about how she beahves with me.in front of her...i was only talking she was totally blank ddnt know where to go..n where to look..after that she has stopped taking my mother' s name..she wont dare to ....i made her cry...that day...she must hv never expected this from me....not even in her widlest dreams...
n its not that i cant gv her back..but who has so much of energy n brains...she can think ...speeak ....make stories all lies...non stop...all around the clock...tell me ....me with one daughter n working ...my husband is also a busy man...i wud prefer giving time to them rather than answering her back..n breaking my head on her silly talks...as a dil i am keeping that respect between us.....n all those massages n chamchagiri...was the story of the time when i had no children ..now 4 get it...even if she tells me i wont do it..... jooti replied. my IL' s are educated people but they are REALLY clueless!! they behave a certain way coz i am DIL, how stupid?!! Chandrika Ghai replied. Hi gg,

I am really impressed the way you have described about your sister-in-law. I am well educated and working (a middle position) in a Pvt. company and my husband is very well educated and working in a very senior position in an MNC. I have been married for the last 6.5 years and also have one daughter who will be 5yrs in nov.But my problem is that I am staying with my inlaws and they have made my life a big hell and my husband just follows them because he doesnt like my parents and my sisters as he has been taught that they have not given dowry according to his status. They always tell him something against me and he follows them blindly if I say something he starts abusing me so please tell me and take advise from your sis-in-law and tell me how to change the situation.We cannot be seprate from my inlaws becoz my husband says that can be possible only after his death.Pls gg & other advise what should I do as I have never seen such clever people in my life it is very difficult for me to understand their games.

Thanks

cg gg replied. i will always blame dil for everything...whtever i went thru was only my mistake ..i ddnt listen to my mom ...infact i b4 mrrg i thought my mil was crore time better than my mother..my mil was so nice...she did so much for me...not even my mother did ...my mother had warned me...she said the way this female is behaving with u no mil in this world will do for her dil...she had warned me...to be careful ..but my god knows i thought my mohter is jealous coz she never got along with her mil....
i always knew how my dadi use to harass her even though we stayed nuclear...i never trusted my mother...
but my mil really harassed me...after mrrg
when i was preg she was after my life that u wash clothes of all the family ohterwise u willhv ceacerian..my n bro-in law supportedme ..
trust me if i wudnt hv had other members support she uwd hv eaten me raw......i was so young so innocnet she put all the responsibilites on my head...i myself was like a kid...
all the time she praises her self...non stop....
now i come to know she was always dirty...shabby..who use to hate cooking n doing house work..all the time she wud watch tv..n my fil after coming home from work wud clean house...n do all the work....
she wud get jealous if other members of my family use to care for me...they all love me a lot...
she wud ask my fil y do u get irrited on me if i say soemthing to her (me)..do u hv a soft corner for her?
after that my fil stopped talking to me...my mil is jealous, cunning, liar, n one biggest asset she has on this world her big mouth...which is only for eating n talking purpose
but right now she is going thru a very bad patch..my sil has givne her shock of her life.....
she deserves.... Swapna replied. I got the picture now. I can' t handle one temporary MIL at home and you have 15 people in your family. I guess i won' t even have the energy to look into each of their faces everyday.
My MIL too is a super moody and crazy woman. She worked all her life in a big metro city but sooooo backwards in her thoughts.
She' s such a pessimist and always have not so good things to say about everything. Im a hardcore optimist on the otherhand and all her negative comments brings in negative energy in our house. Even she made veiled attacks about my mom but I ignored them. I didnt want her to carry bitter memories from my house. Neverthless she' ll still have a ton of bad things to say about me to my FIL and SIL.
Even she' d be totally if my dh were laugh or smile with me or if we had had some lone private time. Such a specimen.
My countdown to MIL riddance is just not getting any nearer. Two long months to go before I have my house and family all to myself.
More power to DILs like you.
Cheers