Parents of Schoolgoers  Discussion Forum

Hi everyone. Ihave been married for 11 years but between me and my husband mature conversation is not there. whenever i have a problem with him or his mother and sister, he stops responding and becomes quite. this part is sooooooooooo irritating and because of this i looose my temper and starts shouting at kids and i mean i get out of control. whenever i feel weak emotionally he is not there for me he acts as if nothing happened and i am making it up. i am sick of it now. if i get angry and stop talking to him , he will also stop talking and wont talk to me for days and finally i am the one who surrenders. please friends i am loosing my confidence, self respect because of his behaviour, please please tell me some tips to handle such tedha people in life who have politics in each and every step. please help me , i am really desperate. thanks manimaran replied. Hi sonia, Im manimaran currently in dubai. I will tell why most the husband is like that 1. There are 2 relation for a male onething is mother side and another is wife. For example if wife makes any mistake then the mother will expect favour from the son . As well as if the mother or his sister makes any mistake then wife expects a favourable action for her side. But for the husband both the relationship is important like our eyes. Thats why most of the husbands keep quiet when the probs arrives. Bcos he cannot give up either his mother nor his wife. This queralling and small small things will happen in our daily life just forget it and keep on doing the good things what u can do. Since u told u r loosing ur tempt and showing it to ur childrens is totally unfair. So to control ur temp try to do yoga if u have time. otherwise whenever u feel that u r loosing ur tempt then start counting numbers upto 100. Deff this will give u a good solution to u. Try to be a good mother,wife as well as daughter in law. i know its very diff. If u determind to do u will suceed. My best wishes.
Bye. Manimaran with a attitude similar to ur husband. (Note: If ur husband open's his mouth then the probs will be more only.Everything is for ur good, what he is doing). sonia replied. Hi bb
thankyou so much for your advice. i will definately follow the advice.
thanks
madhu bb replied. Is ur husband scorpio!!!.... my husband too behave like same.... if there is any argument or fight he stop talking to me after that.... it means now manoo him... if i dont talk to him for days than he will also not talk to me.... i m married for 2.5 yrs... and sometimes we didnt even talk for 15 days....
earlier i got very irrited bec at the end i was one who manoo him bec i felt alone , he got busy with his mom father tv etc etc....
than i realsed it is just a male ego... they expect us to manoo them even if they are wtrong... so just boost his ego... mana lo na yaar kaya jata ... 15 days ka jagda 2 days may finish ho jata hai....
and as far as emotional attachemnt is concerned why r u feeling after 11 yrears that it is missing... why hvnt u thought abt it earler and worked upon it... is MIL creating any problem???? yaar u hvbeen married for 11 yrs.. not a short tm....
go out together on vacantion.... spend tm together.... and if he his not giving his shoulder when u need it... than accept it as his nature..
dear we girls has to do lots of compromoses.... they men expect us to change.... then will never change.. we have tro sacrifice in the name of family... kids and blah blah blah.. but dont get angry on kids ok
cheers
bye
BB