Parents of Schoolgoers  Discussion Forum

Hello friends I am a 30 year old woman happily married since the last 10 years & blessed with a 9 year old sweet little daughter.Everything in my life has been going smoothly & having got a very loving & caring hubby makes me feel extremely lucky except for this problem of mine that I want to discuss with U all.I dont know how to start with this.Putting it this way \";Is it unappropriate to make your 9 year old daughter sleep seperately\";.
I think this must have been very clear by now.Yes my problem is the lack of privacy that I face before going off to sleep.This was never the case a few years ago but from the last 1 year or so thing have been very difficult for me.It is because I have realised that my daughter is
growing both mentally & physically.My daughter since her childhood so far has only slept wth us in the same double bed.It becomes really hard while having sex to keep an eye on her all the time to check when she changes her side or wakes up in between to go to the toilet or so.This may sound a bit silly but has been a big trauma for me
since a long time now.I have spoken about this to my hubby a lot of times before who thinks it is wrong to make her sleep seperately before she would be 13 just to fulfill our own pleasures.But there is a reason for me to think otherwise & that is because of the recent change in my daughter that I have been seeing recently through a few instances.This happened just last Sunday when we were preparing to go to my hubby's friends house.I was about to wear my saree when I realised that that my saree's pallu needed a bit of ironing.I so started to iron it & that is when my hubby entered the room searching for the
newspaper.My daughter who was till then just sitting in front of me calmly stood up & started looking at me suspiciously.It was then that I got into a conversation with my hubby.After the ironing was done I stood right in front of my hubby so that I could look at him while talking at the same time could wear the saree.It was then while wearing the saree & talking that I found my daughter in an absolutely amazed state as if she had seen some alien in front of her.I quickly asked her what & she simply nodded her head.The next day she came to me quietly & asked me how I didnt feel any shame while cahnging my saree in front of her father.I had no answer & just stayed mum with a embarassing grin on my face.I would have changed my saree nearly a 1000 times before in front of my hubby & never has she ever asked me such a question.Another incident happened just 2 days ago when my hubby & I were having an intercouse in the night as late as 3 or 4 when my daughter suddenly got up & started to run to the hall shouting loudly.Both me & my husband didnt know what hapened & my hubby quickly grabbed his clothes & ran to her.It was after sometime my hubby came back with her,blushing.When asked what happened he told me she ran ahead thinking it was some earthquake.I was embarassed to death that day.I dont know why but I always fear that I she will definetely catch us
both doing something & that day is going to be the most embarassing day of my life.No matter how much ever we try try there is always a bit of sound hear & there created while having sex.To add to it my hubby has this very bad habit of making that typical suction noise while kissing.I hope U understand this cause he simply refuses to get this in his mind.All efforts to convince my hubby to make my daughter to sleep seperately have been unsucessful & now I feel doing it more could only be a waste of energy.Please suggest me something. nancy replied. Hi,
Take your probm seriously. I have a suggestion, whenever you feel like having sex with your husband keep pillows next to your daughter and you both go in another room and after you finish come back and sleep in the same room. The prob is that after a certain age children get disturbed and scared with the smallest sound and it may happen that after knowing someday she might pretend to sleep and then a fear will come to her and she may not even open up to disclose it to you.
What does it harm to you both to take percautions before it is too late.
I personally feel think seriously and separate your self from your bed for those few mins or hrs and get back it will save a lot of trauma. Yours as well as your daughters.
Let me know
Bye v replied. i think u must talk thru my address.i will address yr problem .massege bourd has some limitetion.my e-mail is:vijaysavvy at the rate hot mail dot com
i understant yr problen i i will answer prpperly