By Mrinalini Kulkarni (Committee Member, Bal Asha Trust)

Shyam’s adoption was possible because he was declared destitute after the process of law was complete. He received help and counseling regarding adoptions from social workers and psychologists. From the day Shyam came to Bal Asha Trust he was told that he was here temporarily, that he would go to his parent’s home or his adoptive parents. Read on to know more about success story of Shyam’s adoption.

This is the one of the most touching and amazing life story of an older child called Shyam. Who was found on the Dadar railway station by the railway police in December 2001.  As per the procedures he was brought before the Child Welfare Committee and admitted to the Additional Observation Home, Mankhurd. 

Efforts to trace his biological parents were made. So also photo publication, telecasting his photograph on television as well as a police search was made by the organisation to trace his next of kin or anyone who had some information about him.  But this effort was in vain.  So the authorities declared him destitute and free for adoption in January 2003.

Shyam was transferred to Bal Asha Trust for rehabilitation through adoption in February 2003.

Shyam was a normal child, of a calm and friendly disposition.  In the initial weeks he   was a little reserved but soon adapted to his new environment.  He started going to school, playing with children and engaging in normal social activities.

During this time the social workers at Bal Asha Trust were assessing his progress, the psychologists prepared him for his new life when he was ready to go for adoption.  They also tried to understand his preparedness to adjust in a new set up especially within a family.

In this Shyam showed remarkable progress and inclination towards having his own adopted family. In other words Shyam was as much part of this and aware of the adoption process as the social workers at Bal Asha.

Bal Asha Trust prepared all his documents and started looking for the right family for him.  They got him registered with Adoption Coordinating Agency at Mumbai which would help the Trust to see if there are any families in Mumbai and Maharashtra interested in adopting an older child.  A lot of time passed by, but no family came forward.

Finally in January our Trustee Ms. Madhavi Karandikar received a call from Mr. Purohit from another town but that agency suggested that he was too old to adopt an infant. This is a fact but what the agency did not suggest was that he could adopt an older child and find out if he was interested in doing so.

Earlier Mr. Purohit had approached the agency and informed them that he would like to adopt. The Agency referred them to Bal Asha Trust in, Mumbai. Noting the age of the parents Mrs. Karandikar explained to him why it was important for him to adopt an older child as it is necessary to have a gap of about 38-40 years between the child and the adoptive parents. Mr. Purohit realized the importance of this and told her that he was agreeable.  Mrs. Karandikar told Mr. Purohit to contact her office and he would get the required help and information. She also told him that a lot of patience was required to adopt an older child.

On contacting Bal Asha Trust, Mr. Purohit was asked to come to the office along with his wife. He met Mr. Sunil Arora the Trust’s Administrator The couple came across as very polite and simple and seemed well-prepared to receive an older child.  After meeting the couple, the team at Bal Asha Trust felt that this was the right family for Shyam.

 After submitting all relevant documents, a home study was scheduled at their home.  The social worker was surprised to be greeted by neighbours of the family.  The neighbours introduced themselves to the social worker and assured him that if the child is placed with the family, he will be well looked after not only within the family, but also will be loved by the members of the society.  They were proud that the Purohits decided to build their family through adoption.

The social worker then shared and imparted some simple ways of parenting which would make the bonding between the adopted child and family strong.  The couple listened carefully and expressed their doubts and discussed their thoughts frankly with the social worker.

The fact that Shyam was nearly 12 years old and studying in 3rd Std in a Municipal School was told to the Purohits. The social worker and psychologist also discussed with Purohits that the child would not be as bright and like other children of his age in academic performance but would do well as a moral child is school. The Purohits told the social worker that they did not have unrealistic expectations from Shyam that he would become a doctor or an IIM Graduate. They wanted him to graduate or even if he did not, they would prepare him to handle their lath workshop and train him to earn his living and be independent. They had a modest home and good family friends and that Shyam would grow up in healthy settings. They were very receptive and understanding towards Shyam’s situation and had a realistic outlook and attitude towards the future with the child.

The social worker and psychologist found this attitude very healthy and realized the family was well-prepared to adopt an older child. They had patience and understanding and emotional stability.

Soon Shyam was introduced to the couple.  Within minutes he overcame his initial shyness and within hours they were playing and laughing as if they had known each other for many years. This was really happy moment for all of us!

The couple came everyday for the next 10 days and spent the whole day with Shyam. With every passing day the bonding grew stronger. The couple took him out for short hours and when Shyam returned he would be beaming!  We still recall the day when his adoptive father brought him the family album and he just could not stop flaunting it very proudly.

One day we asked the Purohits not to come to meet Shyam.  We wanted to observe the reaction of the child and the parents.   During the day Shyam kept on asking why his papa and mummy had not come. On the other hand, the Purohits kept on calling the office imploring us if they could at least come for 15 minutes. From both their reactions we were convinced that these were the right parents for Shyam.

After further processing of documents and signing the petition was over, the day came when Shyam had to go to his home.  Shyam was full of excitement and had eagerly packed all his favourite things, his bags, school books, drawings and toys.  The family performed a small Pooja in Bal Asha, a ritual when a child finds a home.  He bid farewell to all.  One thing was very obvious that Shyam was very much part of the adoption process and it seemed so natural that he was keen and well prepared to face the future with his new  parents.