Moving house is a traumatic experience. It affects children the most as they feel insecure due to separation from their friends. Help your children be comfortable with the moving. Here's how.
Before the move:
Have a positive attitude. Even if you're not thrilled about the move or are preoccupied with the hundreds of details that have to be sorted out, try not to show it. Don't aggravate your child's negativity by whining yourself.
Brace yourself to face a lot of whining and sulking. Be patient and understanding. A child derives a lot of security from familiar environs and established routines. Being uprooted from their homes, separated from their friends and having to go to a new school, can be quite traumatic.
Constantly remind them about the plus points of the place you will be moving to. But at the same time, don't forget to tell them that you sympathize with the way they feel.
While you should allow your children to express their anger and about the move, do not allow them to cross the line into inappropriate behaviour. Do not relax your standards of acceptable behaviour. It will just be one more thing in their lives that has become unpredictable.
Your children should not feel that a door has closed on a part of their lives. Encourage them to resentment so that they can keep in touch with their friends. They could also make a scrapbook of photographs. If possible, arrange for a friend to come visit in the vacations or vice versa. A farewell party will sweeten the bitter pill of separation.
Let your children participate in the move. Allow them to choose what they would like to take with them and pack these things themselves if possible.
Give them something to look forward to like a room to themselves or a pet. But don't make promises that you can't keep.
Arrange a trip to your new home prior to moving so that your children can get an idea of what to expect.
After the move:
Do something special with your children the first night that you move in. Take them out for pizza or have a picnic in the middle of your new living room.
Avoid a situation, as far as possible, where your children will have to lose an academic year or skip a year.
Request your child's new class teacher in advance to get another child to show your child the ropes. This may make it easier for him or her to make friends.
Do not make an issue of it if your child attempts to make her new room look like a replica of her old one.
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- The Indiaparenting Team