Parents of Schoolgoers  Discussion Forum

Hi all,
I have a situation that I am not sure how and if I should handle. I live in US with my husband and so does my SIL (husband' s sister).
My husband and sister were never very close with each other they are practically like very distant relatives.
Odd it might sound when I first got married they were not on talking terms something to do with my MIL being at my SIL both had a fight and my husband got involved. THis was kind of a norm. Mother and daughter would patch up later with strained brother and sister relationship. MIL and FIL do not care much and when they visit are happy going to each other homes and say apne apne ghar mein khush raho. First time I met SIL was when my FIL had called my husband to go and get SIL as her inlaws had come and they all had a fight. She saw her brother after practically 5 years when he went to pick her up because she called my inlaws and my husband had to bring her to our home for a day.

After this incident, my SIL comes to our place and calls when her parents are here. I have never been to her place her husband has never come to ours.I have not met her husband and vice versa.
Now she calls for my husbands bday, sometime for diwali and he calls her on hers. I have bascially no relation with her. Very formal hello' s and that' s it. They are no more siblings. My husband is a great father to our kids and a good husband. I have no problem with him. I just find this all so odd. Being a woman I wonder is it possible to be this cold. My MIL told me that SIL is very chalak. Which she is. Very objective and cold.
Do you think I should initiate anything though frankly I am not sure if I like her personality.
Any ideas, suggestions. Sorry for long write up.
neena replied. Well... as a good dil who wants to make the family all the more better you may initiate the patch up between bro n sis. But bad as it may sound I seriously donot think that you should go ahead with this plan ! See ,relatives from inlaws side should be handled with care... rightnow its only mil-sil n ur hubby who fight and they have distances between them. If you willingly jump between them and try to set things right then remember then the next fight may involve you too, and then you may complain abt all the hurtful things you sil said directly to u... how ur mil took sil' s side when she should have sided with you ... how ur hubby was silent all the time etc etc.
Stay away... let their relationship take its own course, may be in future they will patch by themselves . you on your part just be nice to sil whenever you meet . Anand replied. I am new on this discussion board. First i just wanna say that if they keep it just to a limit then it' s ok. Try to keep your interaction with her to a limit. My husband also has a brother who he never got a long with and now they talk like every day. It' s pretty strange! Thank god! he is in australia.
I don' t like his family, they make me feel insecure! sonali replied. hi Reenu,
Its looking odd but when their parents are not much concerned about it, u shd be ok. Because ,when she visits, u r being ok, and calling each other like friends. its goood to each other. Dont try to sink in troubles with a critical character.
Her own brother doesnt like her whcih means, she is something odd. So leave their terms upto them and you maintain friendly relation with her. Not less than it... ' ESPECIALLY' ...not more than it!
ok, bye. take care !