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I am working mother. My kid is 5 months old and I find it very difficult to manage my house, career and my child. I always feel guilty that I cant give time to my child. I do try and spend as time as I can with my baby but I dont like the idea that my kid has to spend his time with the maid. But at the same time I cant leave my job because I am not the house wife kind of a person...i feel i shall be stagnant and cut off from the world. Need advice please help. hema replied. Dear Aparna,
When the baby is very small, daycare is a safer option. if you are Mumbai, there are plenty of such options. But there are some kids who prefer their own homes and do like to be left elsewhere ( like mine). So i had shifted to a maid when my daughter was about 2.5 - old enough to talk.It is not impossible to get good maids.But the most important is try not to be a super woman, the secret to a good career and also being a great mum is to get routine household chores done through maids - this includes cooking, cleaning and even some bits of shopping.It gives us a l;ot of time with the kid ( even more than staying at home moms!!) - its like having the cake and eating it too.Imagine reading the morning paper, watching cartoon and then taking the kid out for an afternoon movie on a Saturday!!.Its really up to us to make things work.
So keep going and good luck. Anjana replied. Hi,
I've gone through the same situation,
the only diference is that I do not cook,
there are some wonderfull restaurants out there , get a home delivery and enjoy life 'cause its too short
take care Neera replied. Day care is definitely a better idea than
keeping a maid. But in case you do not have
good day care centres in the vicinity then
you can have a maid alongwith the child in
day care. Even I did it - in this way the
child has the best of both worlds - the
child will have a person dedicated to
him/her and will also have a chance to
interact with other kids. And the other
advantage is that the maid can help you
with the household chores in the evening
when you get back home.I was always hesitant
in leaving a child at home alone with the maid.
alone with maid at home is jaya replied. Hi

It is indeed painful to be away from your child but if you feel working keeps you balanced, then don't feel guilty. working will make you feel complete and you will be a better mom.
Learn to manage your time. Leaving your child at the day care is indeed a better idea than leaving your child with a maid. Day cares have programs, schedules and rules, and its easier to get to know whats happening with your child there. Day cares are safer sice they follow the schedule and the people there are bound to be more responsible and educated.
Secondly, manage your time efficiently. Career, baby and your husband are more important than the household chores. You can give more tasks to the maid. Delegate chores to others. Don't do tasks that you can get done. Use a dhobhi service or a laundary instead of ironing. Save elaborate cooking for holidays. Don't spend a lot of time on cooking. Ask your hubby to help you while you cook and clean. This way you can share each other's day and spend time together while doing the chores. Spend time with the baby till the baby sleeps. THen utilize time to get things ready for the next day, relax and spend time with your hubby.
Involve your hubby in child care. Fathers also feel good when they are involved. ANd I am sure your hubby will be most willing to help you out with your tasks.
And don't feel guilty or bad. Apart from being a home maker and mother, you have a life of your own too.
All the best! shoba replied. i have a two year old and i am expecting one in a couple weeks. I know the pain of returning back to work after the maternity leave. I would also suggest day care for a maid. Also to help yourself spend more time with the baby i would suggest u cook in the mornings before u get to work and that had helped me a lot to spend time with my young one. It is initially tough to handle but u gain a lot out of it. When u get home make sure u spend enough time with ur kid before he/she goes to bed. That will make u feel a lot better. Jasmine replied. It can not be easy returning to work, being a new mom and dealing with all the house chores. It is a difficult which us working moms decide to deal with. No matter what decision you make, you may feel guilty if you are not the type to stay home.

Maybe if you put your child in a day care during the day where he/she will get some enrichment from their program rather than being home with the maid, it may help you.

I know that I think about it all the time but I always remind myself how much my child has developed by being in the day care. I don't think he would have developed as much with me or anyone at home.