Planning a Baby  Discussion Forum

hi,dear!!
so how r u doing now? misunderstandings cleared? i checked that board which priya mentioned. its ok...some people can be pretty narrowminded at times. have u ever read msgs on the sex board? u may find some real weirdos there. i think they post msgs just for fun... but its fun to read them too!! although many are there with genuine concerns! u must chek that board. it may help take ur mind off ur present worries. and man, some of them get really offensive at times, so much so, tat indiaparenting has to delete/modify those messages.
how do u keep urself busy? keep me updated bout urself.
i had a physical today. may get the report in a few days. doc says, everything seems normal but she will send other details at my postal address. and u know wot? she said it may take 1 year for me to conceive...and that i should try for at least 6 months before seeing a gynec!!
that was shocking..but im happy in US. at least i dont have 'friends' who keep nagging me bout having a baby!!
so how r u feeling nowadays?
i had a really good vacation! my brother in law was here. remember i once said, i dont want him to get married before i have a baby..? i hate myself for that. he is such an adorable fellow!! i just wanted everyone in my husband's family to hold my baby first bcoz he is the eldest in the family and his baby should be the first one to get everyone's affection. was i being selfish? u can understand my situation, cant u?
and no, dear! negative is not wot we talk..negative is wot we have been thru...and naturally our feelings reflect our experiences. i dont think i m negative but i know if god has been unkind to me once, he can be once again. i dont trust him anymore...
love,
pari. sonia replied. Dearest Pari,

thank u so much for being a friend.
U know today i got my periods and again i was disappointd. iknow i connot be pregnant now. mu hubby is away for last 2 months and last2 mths i got my periods.So i know its not possible but still like an idiot i was hoping. i had heard about ladies who get their period for 3-4 mths even when they r prgnant. so i was hoping...but now everytime i get my periods i like hate myself. They r so punctual. never ever miss to come and wash out all my hopes.
i know i might b sounding like a fool writing this.

pari now i have to visit the new doctorcause i plan to go for hysterroscopy next month. last time when i visited and he told me what procedur i have to follow, now i just cant remember. i was so disturbed that time since it was immediately after dr malpani( i hate to call him Dr) goofed it up . i was not in state to comprehend what he was saying. so i ahve to see him again. i have to ask him so many things. but i just go blank.im really afraid to ask him my doubts because if the ans is negative what will i do? but i will make courage and go . i have to do it.


ya what u say abt ATM q is right otherwise i would be holding my baby long back.


Pari did ur doc did some test when he told u one year. on what basis did he giv eu that time period.?


Im just waiting for my hubby to come back. 2 .5 months to go.
Yes my sil stays with my MIl . and they stay very close to my house.

When i speak to my sil she keeps describig abt her prgnancy.And she and ny Bil talk like what the baby is doing , baby is sleeping , baby is hungary.i Know she feels like talking to me abt her pregnancy. but that disturbs me. i feel like running away .

Ok pari i will take ur leave.
keep in touch
love sonia
Sonia replied. Hi pari, it was nice of u to mail. missed u lot. Good to know that u had wonderful vacation . And That u can keep ur mind off atleast for sometime.That was a much needed break i guess what u wanted.

Ya pari i do vist the sex site attimes. Actually my first msg i had posted on that board by mistake . To tell u the truththat board doesnt amuse me much
im stuck with tis board..like addicted. Rather my life is only stuck it seems. u know i cant think of anything else no matter how hard i try.This is the only thing i wish at present.Im really raying hard and i hope god is listening.

U know I didnt visit my in laws for last1 month almost. My MIL kept asking why im not coming over. i went on MOnday there as my MIL was operated.And to my bad luck my SIL had gone for some blood tests and to hear the Featal beat. When she came back, i just sat for 5 min and literally ran away giving some reason. Pari i just cant stand her . she is a good friend and we get along well. but now im not ableto cope with this situation. When all my fiends got pregnant and have babies i never behaved like tis . i was at ease. always thinking next time will be my time and being and disscussing with my friebds abt their pregnancies. But now im avoidind my SIL . To tell u the truth im thinking like God has been unfair to me. Why pari?What did i do?
why is he punishing me like this?


What u feel i felt the same way . thta my baby shuld be the first one to get everybodys affection .....but now its not going to be so.

when i face my SIL i feel like let the earth break and swallow me. i Think my MIL has understood this thimg. When i was alone with her she was tell me ...not to worry, everything will b alright . She was trying to comfort me. And i had thought i will burst out crying in front of her, but i controlled.
Pari i think i will stop . cause thereis no end to it now and i dont want to bore u.

I dont understand why wuld it take i year for u to conceive?
Really pari now things r beyound words. I dont understand what is there in his mind. Its destiny. we cant control. beyound praying and waiting can we do anythimg more dear? Have courage.And above all have faith.
Love sonia