Hi Gauri,

Congrats!! May you have a wonderful pregnancy and healthy baby!!
I think ur daughter should be around 2 yrs old. Right?
Actually, I also want to have a second baby, but am scared. Were you also scared.
I have so many questions in my mind -
1. how will I handle 2 kids with job.
2. with education n all prices shooting high, is it a good idea to have another baby.
3. whats the right gap between the 2 kids
4. when should i plan the second one
You are also a working mom, so i thought it would be good to know your views.
All working moms, please share your views also

Thanks
MG gauri replied. last nite i was talking to my friend in US about u we were discussing the same topic. i asked her how she takes care of baby. she does all the house work single handedly wihtout any1s help no matter what she has to do everything alone, she goes to work . though its a part time but still its not easy to look after husband and 2 kids all alone. i think u live in india. in india atleast you get maids easily u can hire one. what is a use of earning so much and we are earning for whom?
i totally agree with sandhya gap btwn me and my bro is 10 years, one of my sil has only one son he goes to college his mother still gives him boiled water still he has never had normal water like us. they are so poseesive they dont gv him bike for the fear of accident .. and i think its quite normal many people behave liek this. even i am very poseesive about my daughter . i had taken very good care of my bro i use to love taking care of him. but when it comes to my daughter u must have seen my posts i get so confused so many doubts about what to do with her.
take help of someone i am sure you will get someone to help you. my friends mil daily comes to her house to take care of her 2 childrens, one of my sil her mil is so nice b4 going to off she drops her son at her place. relations are always what u gv is what u get .i dont know what ur situation is but dont think so deeply about ur decision it will creact more confusion but be sure oif what you are doing. Sandhya replied. Only one thing i want to conform to MG is that, It is a perfect idea to have 2 kids.

Let me tell u the reason, i am only 1 daughter to my parants. It was very terrible for me to be alone all the time. They always wanted me to sit with book, concentrate on studies, be very obedient, calm, should not participate in any competition coz that will spoil studies. Should not watch tv. should not go out, too many condition were there on me. in this way they brought up me. too bookish.

They were busy with their things, short tempered for question i put to them. they will make my mind divert to go with other things or scold me. gradually i stopped asking questions or even stopped talking to them. Our house used to be very silent. all the sound in that house will be the noise of cubboard opening, water from tap. other road side vehicle, not voice of a person.

So i　was to scary for many things, all alone in all time. there was no one at my age in that time, all my cousins were over 10 years then me. they wonot have that personal relation with me as i was too young for them.

Now my present condition is that, pshycologically i depend more on others, too scary to meet others, if i go in between 4 people i feel i lack knowledge on many things. donot know how to balance people, i beleive what all they say.

please think if i had a sibling would i have been like that? I would have spoke a lot, learnt a lot, would be more mentally very strong.

I know many people who are born alone are like me. i.e. lack knowledge, too talkative.

The knowledge, courage, guidance, support, strength that a kid share with another kid cannot not be compensated by a mother or father at any time. kids learn a lot more from siblings than parants.

please take my suggestion and go for another child. all the best. gauri replied. my husband never wanted 2nd baby. it was me who always wanted to have 2 children atleast. after convicing him a lot he agreed but said after 5 years but i dont knw its my upbringing i dont like too much gap btwn 2 kids. there was lots of diff btwn me and my bro. my parents were very poseesive about me now htey are doing the same thing about with my bro. also i realised hte way my mother brought me up she was not able to look after my bro that well. i somehow i ddnt like the idea of having too much of gap btwn two kids. my husband wanted after 5 yeasrs bcoz he wanted me to concentrate on my career so that we are in better fin state when our 2nd baby is born. but my thinking is like once u are busy with your career then u cant conc on babies there is something going on my career front on which i took a decision to go for 2nd baby so that by next year i can concentrate on my career well. i mean acc to way my career is going i think it is a wise decision this way i will complete my family also by next year i will be able to concentrate on my career.

2nd i asked my gynaec she was very happy to see me. she was the first person to be happy with my news i told her about peoples -ve reaction. she was like you are soppure to be happy n not sad. she explained to me min gap btwn 2 kids should be of 18 motnsh and my daughter is almost 2 yeras now so health wise its abolutely fine.

its all upto you when you want your baby. another thing is my mil is there to take care of my babies she is quite young. so i dont have to worry about that she keeps proper eye on my maid too.
acc to me my decision is right we are going to have a baby on a right time. anyways 2mrw if i go on a higher post or change a job who knows we get time for baby or not. soemtimes we dont get chance to alk to wahc other when we are busy 4get about making love....lol...
i consider myself lucky that i conceived on a right time.
actually this is a unplanned preg i visited my doctor bcoz i believe that whtever decision we take it should be 2gether i told my husband the solution doc gave but he himself stopped me from doign anything wrong with baby ..its after all one inncent life..
financially i know every age is difficult in raising a child . u ask ur parents they will tell the same troubles they went thru..financially , emotionally. but u cant help it ...its our family, its our identity,
plus id ont want to produce babies weh i become very old