Some parenting mistakes can detach kids emotionally from parents. Therefore, it is necessary for parents to avoid such mistakes. Let us take a look at the parenting mistakes that can push children away from parents.
Being a parent is no easy job and everybody is prone to making a few mistakes at times. While no parent in this world is perfect; there are some parenting mistakes that can leave an indelible mark on the mind of your child. This pushes him or her away from you emotionally. Here are some parenting mistakes that you should do your best to avoid.
Threats of Abandonment
A child usually views the world from the secure nest of attachment and warmth given by parents. Whatever the situation is children should always feel reassured of the fact that their parents are there for them. This feeling of love and attachment to parents is one of the primary factors needed for the proper development of child according to psychiatrists.
Even if the situation is really bad like your kid is refusing to come home with you and it is getting very late, never utter the words â€śI will leave you hereâ€ť. Even a light hearted rendition of these words can shake the foundation of your childâ€™s world. Your kid is apt to become terribly scared and will gradually begin to trust you less if you say these words too often.
Condoning Your Own Bad Behaviour
Children are basically like sponges with an almost miraculous capacity of absorbing both good and bad things from the environment. Kids learn primarily from example and they will intrinsically expect you to live up to all that you have preached. This is why teaching your kids â€śnever be disrespectful to othersâ€ť and then being disrespectful yourself (even if it is to your kids) is one of the worst parenting mistakes you can make.
Of course, you are bound to slip up in your behaviour sometimes but do have the grace to accept your mistakes in front of your children. If you ignore your mistakes your kids will never believe what you preach and will slowly start losing faith in you.
Ignoring Your Childâ€™s Personality
Ignoring the basic nature of your children and forcing them to walk on the same path that you walked on as a child is a huge mistake. Along the same lines expecting your kids to confirm to the behaviour patterns that you witnessed with other children is also a mistake.
Every kid is different and has different personalities and needs. Therefore, the idea that works for one will not work for the other. As a parent not being sensitive to the wants and preferences of your child will lead them to emotionally distance themselves. Learning to re-evaluate your expectations and understanding your child truly might not be easy but it is very essential.
Over-Reacting on Minor Incidents
While incorporating discipline is one of the basic requirements for a healthy balanced childhood, too much of discipline especially in unsuitable forms is extremely bad for the parent-child bond. Over reacting on minor incidents like one bad performance in a test or one broken rule will only make your kid irritated and resentful.
The problem with over reaction on minor incidents is also that your kids will ignore you when you react in a crisis situation. The key is to control you reactions and deliver them in a matured way as your child should feel the gravity of the situation when you do choose to react negatively. Constant over reactions will push your kid away from you and finally lead him or her to ignore you completely.
Though avoiding some of these mistakes might not be too easy with a little practice and self evaluation you will be able to steer clear of them. Once you have identified parenting mistakes that can push your child away it will be easier to better your performance as a parent.
Which parenting mistakes can hamper parent-child relationship? What should parents avoid doing to improve bonding with children? How can parents make children always be emotionally attached to them? Discuss here.
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- The Indiaparenting Team