Relationships  Discussion Forum

Hi guys,
I have been reding this forum for a long time now.I have a few problems too.
1)Why is it that only husband are tired after work,have job related stress or r sleepy that they r never in a mood?Can,t we wives feel tired ever?My husband is always tired and doesn' t want sex on weekdays. Agreed. But weekends, I keep waiting the whole saturday and he only feels like doing it on monday morning for 5 min.
Now I have started dodging him, I wear lingeries but do not approach him and when he does in the morning esp I just don' t move cos If he is not a nite person I m not a morning person.Is this ok what I am doing?

2)My relatives stay very close to me but my husband doesn' t like visiting them very often.Whenever they go out they ask us and every time I know I will have to make an excuse to them for not coming. As a result my cousins have stopped visiting me too.I don' t know how to convince him to mix up with them. Many relatives from my inlaws side also stay close to us,so wen my husband wants to avoid them he makes excuse of visiting to my cousins,so they think he is very close and only follows my relatives which is not true.I try to cover him up on both the sides but now I am tired of doing it. How should I deal with this?

30 My husband is not at all social and doesn' t like going out or meeting people or inviting him.
i on the other hand was not socal before marriage but after marriage I have been enjoying a good group.Also he is very simple and doesn' t understand how people these are so fast and there is so much coming up these days where you need to update urself.But he is just not interested in any kind of change whether it relates to him ,his house,his job or his behaviour.When I try to talk about this to my hubby' s sister who is my age she only takes the side of my husband and will try to cover him even if he is wrong.He is just not socially ept.
I feel jealous of couples who enjoy their life to fullest but my doesn' t know what is fun.Though he loves me a lot but there is a lot more to a relationship.

Guys please reply fast. These petty things are so frustrating.... Preeti Agarwal replied. Hi cher,

I would suggest you to go to your parents place for some days. See if there are any changes in your husband' s behaviour. Once you are far from him, he will definitely miss you. Or when he comes from his work, try to talk to him like how was his day, was it so busy, etc. etc? First make a good relationship with him by talking to him. I hope slowly he will start feeling, how much you love him. Stop asking about having sex with him. Let him come to you. Start taking him to some religious places on weekends. Involve him in your daily life routine. Tell him, what you did whole day. If there is anything bothering you. He will definitely start understanding your needs. Knowingly or unknowingly men can never live without their wives. Just we have to make them realise.

Nyways all the best, wish you have a happy married life.

Preeti Ravi replied. Dear Cher,

I felt quite bad on reading your mail
and can quite understand the feelings
and emotions you are presently undergoing right now.

However, please cheer up and do not
despair as there are much more brighter
things in life which you can yourself
do or atleast share it with someone
whom you care for.

Which city do you hail from ? What are
your hobbies ?

I wish to sincerely share your feelings
and emotions by being a close friend.

I am a well educated and successful
Management Professional based in
Bangalore.

Cheer up and think positive always,

Yours lovingly,

Ravi prada replied. Your husband seems more an introvert kind of a person.As you have said he tries to avoid either sides of relations.The whole problem is with the comfort levels he shares with any of you people.Even if its the matter of physical intimacy a person needs to have a comfort zone with his or her partner to have a lively and healthy relationship.So first of all you need to bring him to a level of comfort with you so that he feels extremely free in your presence.Instead of talking to your SIL talk to your hubby -like a friend ,cracking some jokes or discussing some really amusing things in which he' s interested talking or listening to.The rest will settle by itself once he starts feeling comfy with you.You will soon notice the change when you think and talk from his point of view. cher replied. Guys help,respond please.