Relationships  Discussion Forum

I am a mother of a 2 year old. Expecting another one this year. A few days back I was craving for a food item ( costs $4 ). I asked my husband a few times and he refused saying that is too expensive. I gave in to my craving one day. I did not tell him. I forgot to remove the receipt from my purse. The other day he was going through my purse and found the receipt. He asked me and I told him the truth. He got very mad at me. He says he cannot be in the same room with me. He sleeps separately. When he is at home and my kid cries he does not let me go near her. Though he has been very harsh on me, he wants me to tell everyone that he is nicest guy around. He says his pride is very important. If I damage that in anyway then he will make my life a hell. I cannot open up with any one about how he actaully treats me. Even my parents think that I am very lucky to have a husband like him. I think he is making a big deal out of this but even then I tried to explain to him that during this time sometimes women have cravings. He does not want to listen to me. He just asks me to get out of the room. He says that he does not love me and the only reason he is with me is because of others and because my daughter needs a mother. By the way I work too but cannot spend even a dime without his permission. It hurts a lot. Just wanted to let my
feelings out......

depressed smallfish replied. I know that some guys think they are the kings and wives are just slaves (I fired my best friend because he wan't nice to his wife). Things have changed sis, don't take this kind of behavior from him anymore. It's about time that you stood up for yourself...You did nothing wrong by spending your own hard earned moeny. BTW, if he thinks $4 is too expensive, I sure think he is really stingy. Make him understand that you are not going to take this kind of treatment from him anymore (yes, you have that power, you haven't realized it yet). Rashmi replied. I am surprised that you still want to sleep in the same room as him.What you did was not wrong.(I hope what you consumed is not harmful to you and the featus)so if he holds you responsible let him.As long as your conscience is clear stay cool.Just accept the silence and separate rooms as a matter of fact but take your daughter with you.He will come around if ignored.As for speaking good about him tell him it will be so only if he also spoke good about you. DT replied. \";By the way I work too but cannot spend even a dime without his permission\";....Try to save some money seperately on a regular basis(like every time you get paid) without your husband's knowledge. It could be as little as couple of dollars a week or even the spare change lying around the house. It will add up in no time. Every little bit helps. Trust me! Don't stress yourself too much over his insensitive behaviour especially during pregnancy. Try to detatch yourself and ignore him for a while. Concentrate on your own health, and your daughter as you already have a full plate in front of you. Good luck. replied. Dear depressed,

Why are you indulging in self-pity and guilt ? The next time, try not to loose your presence of mind. When you have a craving, eat it, throw the receipt immediately and forget it.

Also why do you allow your husband to punish you ? You dont have to spend money to pretend. Just like you chant mantras without knowing the meaning, keep on praising your husband and forget it. Try to enjoy your life with your money.

Best of luck