Relationships  Discussion Forum

Hi all

I am 24yr old and living in US with my hus......we have been married for 10 months now....my husband is very caring and loving to me and i am very posessive about him........i love him more than even my parents ...........but i doubt if he is giving me back the same..........he is very attached to his parents and sister amd writes mail to his parents daily without leaving a single day.......some times even as late as 1 am when we go for a movie and come back late and all........i did not question him about this feeling i would hurt him.......but one day i was not feeling well and he came back late from work at 11 pm in the night and after having dinner he went and started mailing to them........i got really pissed off seeing this and got angry wth him and did not speak to him the whole day........ he has never been away from home till he came to US 2 yrs back ......he feels that they will be worrying about him if they dont get mail from him........his sis and brother are also living abroad and they chat with their parents once in a while or so.......when i say this he says that he is different from them ......i feel that they are his first priority and not me .........i feel very sad about this...........and one more thing is that we have been trying to conceive for 7 months with no result..........will his behavoiur change atleast when he becomes a father.......? god is not helping me to get a child also......i feel like killing myself some times.............i am venting out my feelings here because i dont have anyone else to share with...... rashmi replied. You are behaving like a giddy teenager in her first love.You are crossing the limit of love and into obsession.In the process you are becoming too demanding and possessive that you may drive him in the opposite direction.Firstly his love his parents is entirely different from his love for you and so cool it.You distract yourself with other activities like meeting friends,taking up a hobby or joining college.Please dont go for ababy just to get your husband closer to you.Go for it when you are ready to take up the responsibilites that go with it.Choking someone with your love is not true love but to give and recieve a lot of space and understanding is. mala replied. well anu remember this man who loves and respects parents also love wife and reapect her,i am in your position i have a husband whio is ver nice to me as well as to his parents,u know something when any quarrel happens he never supports me i mean like they are elder you should take it easy,he says.after my anger is gone i feel the same,you should be possessive abt him but do not compare with his parents.when you will become a mom you will know.i came t know when i became a mom.
regarding kids,first try to understand each other completely,enjoy life for some more time and then have kids,plz dont keep unnecessary thinking,u know infact you should encourage your hubby to write mails to their parents,put them in your parents position whenevr you get negative feelings abt them.keep urself occupied to avoid unnecessary thinking.God has given you a wonderful lifs and hubby.thank him for that and all the best to you.

take care julia replied. Hello anu,
I read what u have to say and i feel that u are over-reacting.To start with it has been only 10 months that u guys have been married and i dont think u should expect him to change his life to be exactly how u want it to be.all these years he has been in touch with his family and he has a right to be so even after marriage.this shows how much respect he has for his parents and love for family.so u should be more happy because when u guys have one of your own u can be 100% sure he will love your family the same way.
coming to concieving,are u kidding me.7 months is nothing,it is too early to get disappointed.so show more love towards your husband and have children and lead a happy life.u have a good guy