Relationships  Discussion Forum

hi all,
I am married since last 3 years(arranged) & now got a baby boy 3 months back...i am not able to tolerate my inlaws....we stay with them...my baby is not supposed to have outside food ....but my mil feeds him with biscuits,banana' s chapati,rice everything...i hav tried explaining her but of no use...my husband has a laid back attitude and says baby will get used to the problems hes facing because of outside food....
this is not enough....she doesnt let me wear clothes as per my choice....my room decor...i cant move a small thing in my room from here to there....she says if you want to enter the kitchen do as i say...else dont enter....she wants to remote control the whole house....she doesnt let me go out for dinner or movie with my husband...& if we do so...she comes to me next morning as gives me a lecture on wasting money....i am tired...my husband is not ready to understand my point of view...
he also had some problems with my fil & so we decided to move out of the house & stay separately....but they emotionally blackmailed him....and he gave up the idea of moving out..... i dont know wat to do....
please help Another Girl replied. Hi Priti,

Bad to read what you are going through. The best thing would be to speak with your husband and try living on your own so that you can take care of your own house and family.

Explain your husband the importance of your own home and how the child will be very proud of his daddy when he realises that his father has built his own home.

Go and see the doctor and ask if child is suffering from any problems because of outside food. If yes, get a report from doctor, hand the medicines precription to husband and tell MIL that she is reponsible for this.

Keep your room closed and do whatever you want to do. Try not MIL enter your room and incase she says anything tell that your husband wanted this combination and let your MIL speak to his son. She won' t ever try to suppress her son.

Also take a break, go to your mom' s place and enjoy life. Also let MIL handle kitchen and keep doing whatever she refuses to do. If she says not to get slippers in kitchen, take the slippers there and do wahtever she refuses to, but when she says, politely say sorry, BUT REMEMBER KEEP DOIN WHAT YOU WANT TO DO, even if you have to say sorry.

Once your child is big enough to go to school, try getting him admitted to the best school which is far away from your inlaws place so that you can stay away from in laws.

Remember Priti, do what you want to do, but always be polite. If MIL gives lectures, keep an i-pod on so that you ignore most of the stuff or pinch your child so that he starts crying and you get a raeson to skip MIL.

Don' t let your freedom suppress by that old lady. MIL are crazy at times but to make them normal you have to play tactics. indian replied. stay put for another 4 months. then look out for a job. so all will fall in place... she will take care of the house and you can go out and engage yourself in your field of interests.