Relationships  Discussion Forum

Hi all,

I have been a silent reader of this site,even though i had many problems with my marriage, i have borne a lot. But, now it really hurts me. The more iam bearing, the more iam subjected to bear.

Here goes my story. Iam married for 5 years now, but was never a happy marriage from day one. My hubby is in the curse of his mother and his sister and trusts them a lot. Hence from day one he has hurt me a lot and i was not even allowed to call my parents even once a week, even though i was newly married. He always wanted me to speak to my MIL, SIL and his family and completely break up with my family and i did that too and doing it. So, i call them once in a month or so, even then he is countinuing to harrass me for calling them.

As far as my MIL is concerned, she is mentally sick and has never understood anyone in her life. Then how does my DH expect me to understand her and do sevas to her. She is really a nightmare to anyone, even her own daughter does not want to really talk to her. Iam a working women, and you know how this mother and son behave, as if iam at home and they want all the work to be done by me at home. By evening , when i come from office, she feeds her son to his stomach full and there remains nothing for me. I have to again cook for everyone. will that be disgusting or not..? she is totally fit for nothing and he wants to give all the respect in the world to her. He doesnt even respect my mom and dad, and never ever would.

In spite of all these, with a broken heart daily i live with this guy, thinking about my parents, who faced all sorts of difficulties in bringing me up. Whenever i think of my parents, who brought me up and iam not even able to speak to them a few words, i really breakdown.

Iam sorry to waste your time. i really wanted to pour out my feelings to someone, but who is there to listen to all of these. But, my parents know all these, becoz they had seen my DH and MIL do everything even in front of them. and one fine day, when they asked me, i broke up.

I never ever want to disturb my parents anymore, they have already lost their health becoz of me.

Sorry to bother you all

Luv,
Sri Another Girl replied. Hi Sri,

Before suggesting anything, can you please tell how is your relationship with your hubby.

Try posting instances which can help understanding what is in his heart for you - love, hate, taken for granted or nothing. hi replied. i can understand your pain. don' t be sorry about writing your heart out. listen dear, you are a wonderful person who has all the rights to live a peaceful and happy life. that is the only thing we really need i think. a peaceful happy life. we should do everything possible to ensure that. you studied hard and you got a job. so i will say you are successful half the part ensuring a happy peaceful life. now you have to make sure you enjoy your hardwork and do whatever that makes you feel comfortable and happy. your life is not supposed to be lived feeling terible everyday. you worked hard as a student and your parents tried their best to make you what you are only to make sure you will be happy and content the rest of your life. so think hard. take some time . calm your mind. and think what you need in life. defenitely you have to speak to your parents and should maintain a good relation with them more or same as you did before your marriage. that is important for you to be happy in your life and your parents life. also you should be able to do the things which you think is right.now one part is over. then the other part, you married life you need that to be peaceful so you can get a happy life ahead. only thing you can do for that is show more love and care to your hubby and his family and IGNORE EVERYTHING ELSE. if you can. whatever,let it go. but always keep in mind, you should be able to do things which you really think is right. at least most of them. think this way anyway you have to cook to eat, we cannot expect anybody else to do that for us(it is good if somebody does it with love especially when we are tired). so don' t be sad about cooking i know you will be tired. but sometimes life is very hard to follow. but you can do it. just be strong and focus ON LYOUR LIFE. what you want to be. be it. BE IT. nothing should stop you from that. especially relationship with your parents. you cannot tear that. cannot. also you should respect and care your husband and his parents. if they are dumb to understand what you are showing to them ignore.

also if everything else fails, you know what you deserve. don' t waste your wonderful life for some dumbheads. think dear. GOD BLESS YOU. Namita replied. wht is the point in wasting ur life with such people? if u r financially independent u can stay away may b with ur parents