Relationships  Discussion Forum

My husband calls his parents who live in India once in 15 days or sometimes even longer. I have never had a close relationship with my in-laws due to personal reasons. After some sticky situations with them, i keep my distance. Though with all these differences, i still remind my husband to call his parents every now and then. But my husband having lived away from his parents from college days and came to the US immediately is not very emotionally attached to them ,sometimes postpones his calls. This leads to even more confusion with my in-laws. They think i have an influence on him and am keeping him away from them. I also know they expect me to call them up if he doesnot.

Honestly,I feel bad for them since they are old, and giving their age should not dwell on their mistakes. But the next moment i feel that they could have dealt with some things with tact. Afterall they are more experienced than us and should know better. This really puts me off and prevents me from calling them. Even when my husband calls them, i don't know what to talk. Things or our life here don't change in 15 days. How do you all handle phone calls??? What do you chat with your in-laws? My head just goes blank when i am not the phone. Anybody in this situation? wellwisher replied. Hey ,

I undertand ur problem and I think most of DILs face the same. Espescially people who are in US who have lived with their inlaws for a short period of time. From wat U say I think that to start with U shld just try calling them every week and talk to them. Wat to talk?........thats the question.
For the first few times just plan before talking. Like just ask them about their health . Ask abt ur sister in laws or bother in laws if any. Or jus tell them about something that happened in ur house.Maybe sometimes u hve nothing talk but doesnot matter, Its just a few years tht they ar going to be in this world. So why not please them. You should also convince ur husband to talk to them atleast a few words. It means a lot to the parents. Watever it is when you have kids you will always need them. And their support is a boon.
Just think tht u r talking to ur mother or friend and slowly u will get used to it. I hope it works out for U.
simi replied. Hi,
I have a similar prblem,I just can't think of any topic to discuss with my in-laws over the phone.Its a nightmare.I also just keep on speaking abt the same old things again and again like hows the weather there and its tooo cold out here and blah blah blah....ooh I am sick of it but have to do it yaar.And sometimes my mil makes such stupid remarks and gives unsolicited advice ,but have to bear that too.We do not have a speaker phone as yet but we r going to buy one soon so that my hubby can hear whats going on.Howz that?.... dil replied. I talk very diplomatically every week with my mil. It will be a replay of the same q&a record. What did you have for breakfast ? How are you and the remaining in the house ? Blah Blah Blah. I should have the same tone in voice and call at the same time. And the remaining time she would talk to my husband. And that would be warning him about not getting influenced by me, how sweetly I talk and dramatize and etc etc. Their talk goes on until the recorded voice says \";Your call has ended bye bye\";.