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Hi all, I have a 2yr and 3 month old daughter. When she was 1 yr we sent her to India bcoz I was working at that time and we brought her with my parents to USA just 2 months back. I was pregnant, which was unplanned one. My second daughter is 1 month old now. My first daughter when she came to USA she used to be very obidient and good manner. But after my 2nd daighter was born she is behaving very naughty etc. she tries to hit her sister all the time, she wants to hold her sister if we won' t give she cries and screams alot. She is also very picky eater. TO drink milk my daughter takes 1 hr, to eat her lunch she takes 1 hr and we have to tell her all stories to eat. She used to drink milk happily when she was in India. I had a fractured leg soon after my delivery. I am still can' t walk properly , I am in recovering stage. I quit my job just before my delivery, we thought to keep our two daughters with us and I will stay at home to take care of them. But now Iam feeling very depressed looking at my elder daughter, her behaviour and I am not at all feeling confident that I will be able to take care of my two daughters when my parents leave. By the time my parents will leave my 2nd daughter will be 5 months old. I would like to since the age gap between my two daughters I am feeling that I own' t be able to take care of them on my own. My parents are saying that to send the second one with them to India. We moved to diff state in US and we don' t have any Indian neighbours that can help me or that my elder daughter can play with.

Can anyone tell me how did you managed to raise two children and household chores ??? any suggestions or ideas? How did you all done it? Nick replied. i am like u ..i have 2 kids one 4 year 4 months and another 15 months.All along I have looked after them and worked full time too.
I know its easier sending kids with ur parents but tell me one thing do you expect ur parents to take care of ur kids?
Its your kids and you are responsible for them.How will ur daughter/son feel when they grow up and learn that you had sent them away because you had no time for them.Motherhood is very very tough and one has to be very strong.I have had rough days and sleepless nights and even now I have them but never can I have the thought of sending them away to India with my parents.The more time you spend with them they will be closer to you more ..My son was also jealous when my daughter was born but I spent a lot of time with him and showerd him my attention and gradually it got better.
Just sending kids away is not the solution rather is causes more complications. hi replied. hey


it is natural for you to feel like this. i also felt the same dear. first of all let me say everything will be fine. but there is a lot of hard work and tiring days .but worth it.i would say becaue now you are at home for kids,there is no need to send any of the kids india. because you can take care of them. yes. believe me. i did it. also you know what the most wonderful thing, you beautiful little angels will grow up together and will be the best friends. they need to grow up together. first it will be very iffiult for the elder one to get adjsut . also you will feel like you have lot to do. but after sometime it will be ok. make your elder one the ' BIG SISTER' . and allow her to be with baby when you are with them. make her understand it is her baby. make her involved in her own little ways.and soon everything will be fine. now because your parents are here, spend more quality time with elkder one and make her bond with the baby. always encourage her to do things by herself . so when your parents leave you can manage the elder with ease and focus more on baby. also give her what she likes to eat. so it will be easy. i don' t know if you like you can add drinking chocolate or syrup to her milk so she likes it or any other flavour. anyway you should make her more independent then only you can focus on baby once your parents leave. encpourage her for doing everything by herself. you can watch her doinf things with the baby. also buy big picture books crayons like that and encourage her to spend time like that. also you can send her to some day care for half day or something ,she will get a chance to play with friends and you will get much needed rest.
i don' t know friend whether it helped or not. but in my opinion, the kids should stay and grow together.so don' t be tensed. preplan everything and it will be fine. Ekta replied. Hi depressed Mom,

You concerns are real and worth giving a thought . I am a working mom and I have delivered my second baby last year only so difference between my kids is less than 2 years my first baby is 2 and half and second nine months old. My elder son is very difficult to manage he is a fussy eater and you have to run after him all the time. He never leaves any opportunity to harm the younger one.

When i came to home from the hospital he was always looking for the opportunity to hurt her. Used to pull her leg , put namkeen in her mouth , throw all her clothes in the bathroom . He did not listen to anybody and told us to throw away my daughter in the dustbin as she was crying baby, doing susu potty in the clothes .

He hates to eat / drink does all the wrong doing. Seriously I had run out of my patience and wept atleast once a day. But I believed that things will be fine with the passage of time…. he will start understanding the things. We have to endure his temperament till than .

Now things are changing and I have observed positive changes in him . He has started believing that papa mamma still love him more than the chini and he will always remain our most loved boy irrespective of anything. Day before yesterday he asked me when will chini grow up so that she can play cricket with her and accompany him to park and school. I felt really good , he even told me that chini has spoiled her pants and need a change “ I was astonished, needless to say” so slowly slowly things are improving and he has started showing interest in her . Earlier she used to cry cry and cry only which irritated him but now she crawls and smiles at him . I have told my son that you are my and papa’s son but chini is your daughter . We will take care of you but you have to take take of her . He agreed. Now he has started showing love towards her and I feel on top of the world when I see them playing together .

So everything will be all right try to involve her in small activities. Love her more. Otherwise send her to playschool best way to have some leisure time for you and the younger one.

All the best,
Ekta