Relationships  Discussion Forum

I am new to the board , i regularly read the message to get some inner strenght to keep life going. Today i decided to share my mind too.

Married since 6 years,home maker, mother of two.we live seperately only the 4 of us.no influence from anybody else.

Married life had its small fights but kept going on and on.I have come to a stage of absolute frustration.

he is highly paid, he does take care of all our home needs,kids and mine too. But there is no true happiness.i am also from a good family.

He is a man of less words and i am just the opposite. I keep talking to him .. eg. tells him all that happened at home, at the kids school and all such things etc...

I had noticed this behaviour in him very soon after marriage but accepted it as every person has few behaviours that cannot be changed.

I keep myself busy with my kids, home work etc...
Oflate i decided to observ more than involve myself in everything around me.

My observations:
1.He never takes interest in initiating any kind of talk by himself.
2.He comes back from office and talks to the kids than me.(it hurts a lot).i am waiting the whole day... new place after marriage and no much friends too except for my neighbours.
3.He talks to me very kindly and sweetly if he plans to have sex that night the next day is the same old person.
4.He never repeats any statement more than once.. eg. if i am in the kitchen if he needs anything that i need to take and give him ,he may b from the dining i may not have heard i come back to him and ask what was it about he says*nothing*.
5.He never looks after the kids.eg. he has never did anything like feeding,cleaning, bathing,toliets etc... not even once during these 6 years.
6.He has never taken me out to any of his office getogethers, friends house etc.At the initall days i though its because of my little children and i used to opt out myself but now they have grown up a little but now he takes my elder child along instead of the family.
7. After the small fights that we have he never talks about it openly. it is me who wants to talk and end the issue . now i too do not do this so it goes on and on for days with absolute silence in the house.

If i do not talk there is absolute silence in the house.

End of it all i think i may have to equate mysef to a maid than a wife.
I some times feel i am a pet dog at a rich man' s house.
i have everything in life monetarly but no happiness. Or is it all that i feel wrong about him.

Do i have to change.Please correct if i am wrong.
Sorry for the long message.

mama replied. hai friends,

thanks a lot for the advice. i take every reply seriously.
i have decided to have fun and go out everyday. i was that kind of a girl who enjoys lots and lots of fun, with loads of college friends but after marriage and kids life is just inside the house so oflate not interesed to roam out at all- truth is -a shell. i guess i have to get back to my old self. i am not \" that silly village girl\" but i have become one like that now.
i decided to speak to him so as usual started my blabla but there was just that response to the point.
thank u all very much. not important replied. Your man takes care of family expenses,has kids only from you , is not after any other women & also one more great quality ' does not talk that much!' ..according to me he is my dream husband!..Gal, you need to break out from your shell, may be start working or something or even if not, just try to chill out & relax with your girl friends.If you dont have any, then make em' ..Dont be the boring house wife but a chick wanting fun all the time!.
Every morning when you wake up think about how much fun you can have in this big wide world! Go after it. Change your looks , get some new clothes, make yourself trendy & go out & have fun
navin replied. i think ur husband get little upset on you,coz ur tradional girl i think , may he be want somemoderate girl in life , but also he cant leave also coz he love u so much ,but some incdent he may be forget u or not intersted on u ,he may be in confuse whom to choose,
u must became moderate girl first, u must talk with him even he dnt talk with u , u discuss with him abt ur relationsip, other wise it effect onur childerns also , so u want to setrate now only ,other wise u will be in trouble.good luck