Relationships  Discussion Forum

hi all,
i am a Postgraduate software engineer married for 3 years and have a 14 months old baby girl.
i have absolutely no issues with my husband.
but all the trouble with MIL. she is very dominating and very demanding.
i am cook food in the morning and go to office she helps me most of the time. for my small mistake she points out and starts commenting ..which i dont like.
i feel since how i have changed after marriage she should also mend her ways she cannt be like how she was before . she also has to respect me.
she cant treat me like however she wishes.
for trifle things she assumes some thing negitive and gets angry and stops speaking to me.i come from office to relax and play with my kid but she sits there with a big face.
Actually she is like that even before i got married.
i want to live happyly ..i want to be happy for every thing i have.
but this lady is spoiling my peace of mind.

i want to be very practical..and tryed my best to keep her calm ...but she has all kinds of mood swings which i fed up to tolerate.

now yesterday .. i told her that nobody treats me like this and she has hurt me many times which i am tolertating. finaly i lost my patience and broke my silence..and
she trys to control me.
since i am getting tired i planned to keep a cook so that i can spend time with my baby.for which she started that even she was working she did all hard work in raising kid...what not..
but why should i suffer .. i have every right to lead a luxiorios life which i can effort..which she i think doesnt like..when im at home i will be always busy in some thing or other.
so i want to relax and spend time with my baby..

all these days she took me granted as my husband ask me not to argue with her.. but lately i satrted feeling that i im lossing my identity and self repect..i could not wait anymore for my husband would do something to help..rather he is brouht up like that tolerating his mother ..got used to her..........but i am not brought up like that ..i am given lot of importance at home very where i go.

just wanted to share my feelings at this board.
i expect some wise ladies to comment suggest ..
was i wrong????? .....
pitiful replied. I know what you r going through. These Mils are just taking advantage of their position. I think they were tortured by their MILs and now they want to pass it down. I dont think at all that you r wrong. At once hire a cook, manage your house as you wish If she compares her life with yours, tell her that it depends on a persons choice about how to spend ones time and how to manage. Then ignore any other comments but do only what you want.This is the time when you need help, its no use spoiling our important years of life, due to wrong advice of inlaws. They r not our welwishers. All they want that we obey them, they rule us.Avoid talking to her much, so that you dont have to reply her back. Dont pay attention to her mood swings, be normal with your routine and consistent with her. Priya replied. Same condition with me too, just thoughtof sharing. Mine was a love marriage, absolutely no problem with my hubby, but MIL is the problem. Lucky me, she does not stay with us. But creates problem whenever she comes to stay or we go there. Worst thing is she does not complain anything directly to me, I behave too good and dont give a chance (bcoz of my hubby. Then she tells something to my hubby when I am not there, some comments, I could hear from kitchen if I listen, which makes him angry with me. Pass comments about feeding my baby - like give her this and give her that etc.. But she will not do any thing for my baby !!! I work and she will be spending whole day with my baby, but still I have to do all that... There are so many exmaples.. I dont know why they are like this.. Whatever you do, they will not love you. There are very few lucky girls who gets good MIL' s.
Take care