Planning a Baby  Discussion Forum

My husband and I have been trying to get pregnant for about a year. We finally got pregnant thru ivf. I am now 11 week along. Yesterday, my doctor did a sonogram and said that it looks like a girl. He said it's still early but that is his guess! So, now my husband is wanting me to abort! We fought so much because I can NOT do it. I already feel like I am in love with this baby! Maybe because we've wanted this baby for so long. We already have a daughter, so he says he wants a boy now. I feel as if he's being very shallow. I don't think there is anything wrong with having 2 girls. What should I do? Should I go against my intuition to make my husband happy. Or should I do what I feel the right thing to do is? Sunshine replied. Dear babyfairy,
I can only imagine what u are going through, tell that selfish pig of a husband how it would have been if his grandfather had reacted the same way for his mom, or if his parents reacted the same way for his sister! Not just mathrobhoomi, ask him to watch Lajja as well. Here there are so many people, dying inside every month for the want of a child and this .. (i have no words) wants to kill his unborn child!
I'm sorry, I can not imagine the situation u are in. Please take care and help this MAN understand parenthood. Be strong n brave. Much love to you,
Sunshine vidhya replied. what your husband wants you to do is murder your own child!!!this is a crime!!!dont ever become a murderer!!!you will have to live with the guilt feeling of killing your own baby for your entire life!!!that too after waiting for sooooo long u have got this precious gift!!!gaurd it with your life....its your duty to safegaurd ur baby. Simba replied. Sorry to say but your husband is stupid and very very selfish minded. After so much effort you are actually pregnant and now he does not want it. Stupid stupid .....
Either way 11 weeks is too early to say for sure anyway. I think you can be sure of the gender only after 19 weeks. Tell him that.
Also this is the reason why in India most educated doctors do not reveal the gender of the baby. It is illegal.
I've heard this from several freinds and my sister who lives in India.

anyway i would tell your husband that 11 weeks is too early to say anyway... so at 19 weeks you will know for sure.

Put your foot down and say you will be a part of this nonsence.


Simba strawberrypink replied. Sorry To say that.
Just ask him if he knows what a women will go thru to give birth to a baby,and even after gothing IVF n so much can't he understand?Whatz in his head?
God just can't believe that these kinda people still exist.
What wud he do if it was a boy?ask him to do the same for this little angel.Girls are no less,they are always a step ahead then boys.
Pls ask him to read all these replies.
I have just lost my cool. catch_sg replied. you know what we all r ttc for few months, some of us for years and there has been no luck.. it has been a journey of despair ,anger, frustration, faith , believe in god, prayers and now that u got ur prayers answered after all this how can ur husband even think of doing this? a child is god's precious gift maybe not all of us can have it and when u have got ur precious gift please please dont kill her.. think of those thousands of couple whose dreams start every month of having their own child and ends in trying again next month. its all trying and trying and yet god has never been kind to them.. God is kind to you. accept the kindness..tell ur husband that girls are no less than any boys in this world if not ahead of them in all the fields and aspect of life. talk abt girls and they are everywhere at the top of every field .
make ur husband realise that.
sorry for the emotional outburst but hope u can understand the pain and agony we all go thru every month every cycle just to be able to create a life be that life be boy or girl ..a life is a life and we have no right to destroy that for such a reason that is unimaginable.
Pooja replied. I have been in this ttc journey for over an year and I can understand your pain. You both took so much pain in having a baby, why to loose her now ? You two must have known it earlier rt, it can be a boy or a girl...then why to abort her now ? Your husband would have been dissappointed thats why in the moment, he said that....I think try to cool him down, by not fighting, just try explaining it to him...its your baby. You both must have spent so much for the baby...

I wish you well dearie...please donot abort her...

Pooja karishma replied. Oh God!!!

Y is ur husband acting like a nerd, sorry to say so!!

How can a father be so cruel to think about aborting his own child and that too when he knows u both r trying so hard to conceive and when u've gotten thru it, how cud he think of abortion.

I am totally shocked. Pls. tell him, its that the doc just feels tht it might b a baby girl. Wat if later u come to know tht it was actually a boy!!!!

What will he go thru, when he comes to know abt. it.

Doesnt he know tht IVF is so pricey and tht u hv gone thru all the torture, Y shud u also think of discarding ur baby??

Please try to make him understand, baby!! Please dont abort this angel of urs even b4 it has seen this world. Please tell him tht its ok in rearing two girls. pls. make him understand.

I know wat u r going thru. Dont even hv any negative thoughts in mind. Stay Positive and make ur husband understand.

We at ttc board will pray for u and ur child.

Much Love,

Karishma