Relationships  Discussion Forum

Hi,
I am a little bit young, just a school girl--I'm 16. I have a question, I dare not ask my Mom since she will wonder why I ask this, but...

1-My Mom always wears her Mangalsutra, she is a very devoted wife...All my Auntys wear theirs all the time...except if they swim or something, I think.
Q:Why do so many (Indian)women here (the U.S.)wear it only sometimes and not everyday? I go to a local Indian supermarket and I know several of the girls working there and shopping there do not wear it much. They are Hindu and they wear it only sometimes.

I am hoping no one will be mad for me asking so many questions.

Q: also, is it bad to chat with a boy you like on the internet that goes to your school? He is in the same class as me...we both are taking a Science class together...I have not yet given him my Yahoo ID...

Please let me hear some advice...
I am just too much worried that my Mom will not be happy with me asking to much right now... ss replied. Hi Tejal

Mangalsutra earlier was considered a symbol of a married woman. But now as woman are getting more and more liberated they realise that these outward signs are not all important. It is a part of a beautiful tradition during marriage ceremonybut after that it is a matter of choice. Also here in US because women generally wear western clothes they prefer to wear neckware that matches that.

About chatting with your classmate. If he is in the same class as yours why do want to chat with him, you can talk directly to him. Chatting willl only encourage you and him to say things that you would not in normal circumstances.

Also have you tried talking to mom about any such questions. At your age your mom and you should be open to each other. And you can discuss these things with her. She is your best advisor and guide. If you are that uncomfortable maybe an aunt that you feel close to can guide you. It is important for a girl to have a friend who has her best at heart and give her mature advise. All the best. Advice replied. Hi Tejal,

Its very matured of you to ask someone before you take steps! As far as the Mangal Sutra issue is concerned, people are just taking it for granted. In our mothers' generation it was considered a offence of god if you keep your Mangal Sutra away from your body. Even with my mother, she used to tie that in her arms when she changes between the chains that hold them. But now its like everybody wants to wear fancy chains, so they don't care. Its upto you. If you want to stick to that old tradition, you can have a self-satisfaction that you are doing something good for your husband.

Next isue chatting with boys on the Internet. If you can handle it in a very very emotionless way, then it is okay to give id to others. But sometimes what happens is that people take over your mind with words. You should survive that. If you feel you are vulnerable to people who talk so much and you believe them (For example, you buy things by listening to marketing guys) then it is safe that you do not start these things in life.

Good Luck!