Relationships  Discussion Forum

I am married for the past 2 years.Always me and my husband have had problems only because of my in laws.She doesn't want me to have a child(naver said it in words).She is a homeopathy doctor and often give me sometablets in the begining telling it is for my good.(Then i had my periods regularly in 28 days and we didn't have any s** relationship).I ate it hesitantly because if i disagree my husband wud fight wih me.Then later i found my periods going irregular after each month of eating the tablets. when i was undergoing treatment i was staying with my parents for a week and I did not go and visit my inlaws(Doctor asked me to stay in rest mostly with legs raised position.I didn't go anywhere else also).Before me going to my parent's place my mother and father went in person and asked permission from my inlaws.Despite of all these one day my mother in law called my father's mobile and said \";here after don't send your daughter.Have her with you itself\";.Immediately my hubby also stopped calling me(or attending my calls).Then 5 days later when all my medicaions were completed my mother called my hubby and spoke with him(to wish for his B'day).He said he really miss me very much and he came to our house and he took me to his(IL's) house.Then the same evening my hubby left for bangalore and i stayed with my in laws for a week and then returned to bangalore.My hubby is a puppet in my MIL's hands.Since he came and took me from my house avoiding my MIL's words,She is angry with me.She wants her son to speak with her for 1 hour daily.After speaking to them almost everyday my hubby is shouting at me for no reason.And she always want to know my periods date and everything.Nowadays i am not telling but my hubby is teling her.She calculates my ovulating days and stirs up a good fight.Usually he fights for no reason at all and will go to the guest bedroom.I have tried to keep him smooth atleast for my ovulation days.But that doesn't work.Day before Yesterday (One of my ovulation days) my mother in law called him at night 10.00 clock and after she spoke he came to me and said that i was overhearing him.I didn't mean to overhear or anything.But i was simply sitting in the nearby chair and happened to hear all they spoke.I didn't even comment on that i just told i didn't overhear atall.But he started scolding me.Suddenly he started beating me like he is a mad.I got several bruises and cuts all over my body.I wanted to call my parents.He immediately started holding my legs and told that he could not afford living without me.So i didn't tell my parents.He loves me.But he is a puppet.i feel insecure.My hubby would do any harm to me if his mother asks him to do so.My parents are ready to support me if i go home until i get a job both financially and mentally.Even i love my husband so much.What should i do?Should i tell my paernts of what happened and go my way?I don't have a child and my MIL is playing so many tricks in this.She doesn't want me to have a child so that her son's money and love will be only for her.I am in a great confusion regarding what to do.Still i have pain all over my body.I am worried please tell me if i should stay or go to my parent's place. xxxx replied. I do agree with what di bh told you.Don't care damn for your in-law .Is life is not for them and your life is not just for to get just married and get harased by them.If your husband realises and support then its good.Otherwise ask him to forget and you start your own life.
Coming to kids,i know it will build up the relationship between you and your husband.But once you have kids you are stuck in the relationship.So think over what needs to be done for your life. di bh replied. Hey you need to build some courage and make your MIL and husband face the music.I have been in your position.Hey as Shanthi mentioned My in laws also did the same. being a professional grad i thought these things are not true. But for 3 yrs my husband abused me like hell. Thanks to my in laws doing Black magic so that son will always be there son. Imagine my in laws did it so that my husband doesnt get a job and go back to India. Such is their evil mind.Now i do believe in them.
Anyway u need to tell your parents. when my husband physically and emotionally abused me i told my parents so they will not be surprised when i eventually take a drastic step. After 3 yrs when it didnt stop i took some action and now everything is ok. During that time i was temporarily separated from my husband. My parents stood by me then. You need to tell your parents and as far as your husband abusing you . this is just a start.Hope it wont happen again. But who know better be safe then sorry.When i took a drastic step against my hubby my parents stood by me as i had keep them in the loop.
And one more thing now they must be something legal against domestic violence in india right. why dont u try for a temporary separation . I did it and my almost dead marriage survived.
Also dont tell your MIL anything about your periods.Dont take any tablets which she gives.When u are in temporary separation tell your husband u need to spend some time alone with him and not to communicate with his mom.When i was in separation my in laws tried to pile everything on me but i gave them back and told them to back off. One thing helping is I live in US and they in India. They dont want us to live here as my SIL /BIL stay in india. SIL is also one evil witch trying to run my family. So i told her to back off. by then my husband realized my value.
First u need to stop taking what your MIL gives. Resolve your marital life with husband withour MIL interferance. And please do tell your parents. I know when my husband first hit me i did mention it to my parents. My mom thot by me being patient he will stop but it didnt for 3 yrs so i took drastic step and my husband regrets what he did.Dont let in laws ruin a thing which could have been a good marriage. dont give them that joy. They dont deserve it not bad in laws. Not worth sacrificing what cud have been a lifetime of happiness and togetherness.best of luck. post back. Shanthi replied. Hi Dear,
When i read your story i felt as if it is mine.When everyone says even though their mil is bad, atleast they want a granchild from you..but in my case it is not...My mil & sil together trying real hard for not me getting pregnant...so that their financial flow will effect, and my husband will start loving his baby more & their importance will fade.they have done even black magic on me..beleive me i am an educated lady who works outside, never beleived in those things.but i have consulted 7 astros diffrent parts of the places, without mentioning about them(mil &sil) \" why i am not getting pregnant?\" .all said same thing \" b'coz of mil & sil's balck magic\" and all gave same reason saying b'coz it is going to effect their financial flow..I have an unexplained infertility.went through all the tests & latest attempts.and now started believing may be sometimes nagative vibes may work for sometime, with evil power.I have few suggestions for you:
Don't eat anything what ever she gives, even after you get pregnant(she might give some thing for miscarriage).
Try avoiding conversation limited.and it is very necessary to keep good relation with your hubby, to live with him happyly.
use your 100% skills to make him yours, before giving up.Good luck. sangini replied. The medicine she is giving don't eat it don't refuse just take it and throw it and if she insist u eat here then keep in mouth and spit it out.... SANGINI replied. Read your post really felt sad, why do these MILS get their son married to spoil other girls life, if they want MAMA'S BOY, ok now for you, you have to be both tactful and as well as little stern..and oh my GOD she is asking your hubby for ur period dates thats too much. Ok be smart be tactful becasue in this scenario more than u its ur hubby being used.
1) be very nice to your MIL in front of ur hubby be manipulative.
2) I know she will not give u any chance to win but you have to grab the opportunity be very very loving to him during your ovulation date and try to hide your period dates from ur husband i think u can do that if u r not having sex everyday if he ask u r u having ur periods tell him its the lat day or tell him some wrong date when it started and know i think for girl u can do it 3 to 5 days before ur ovulation days so she can't interfere, if u are not to keen to have a boy.
3) sit with ur hubby have some short chats with him call him during the day and say I LOVEU don't get down too much from your dignity don't be false but sometimes its better to show love to make the other person happy.. ask him when he is calm that why does he do this way doesn't he have confidence on you tell him how much u love him in this way u can make him attach to u. I Think in any marriage emotional as well as physical attachment is very imp.
4) Ask him if he can acompany him when he is with his Mother as ur also a part of the family. bUT BE VERY CAREFUL MAY BE HE WILL THINK U ARE SUSPECTING THEM.
5) I Think u should talk to him clearly that u need a Baby as u are at home and as it is u love babies, if he turns u down then think u have tell him that its imp to have kids timely.
6) Last but not the least ur parents intervention is required but when u feel its getting inevitable don't be sacrifing sheep but don't be Jhansi ki rani because too much of parents intervention spoils the things when u feel all is in vien then do it and never let him raise hands on u anyhow he has done it once and can do it again then i think u will have to call ur parents please don't hide voilence then he will also have to face ur parents and set the records straight

Hope this works keep us posted all the best xxxx replied. Hi,
Its very hard to hear that what’s going on with you. I think you should talk to your parents and see any solution from them .As long as your husband doesn’t change this problem won’t solve. I am surprised educated MIL behaving that way. Is that possible for you to move to different city? If you go and stay at your place for a long period is that gives your husband to give sometime and think about the things which has happened and also if you stay at your parents house there are chances of your husband coming over there and you can get pregnant. I think just don’t worry anything about your Mil. Just think about you and your husband. I don’t know whether its good advise or not. but go and stay at your parents place, find a job and see how is your husband communicating with you. Even your In-laws call your parents tell them that don’t worry. If your husband realizes by him self what’s going wrong in his family then that is good. if he doesn’t and if he wants to continue with his mother then you and your family should think about the your life plan. Sami replied. Hello friend!!

I can understand u coz even at present even i am beaten by husband. Even when i am writing to u have so many bruises on my body and suffering so much pain!!!
U are lucky than me coz u have parent to go for who will look after u. I dont have anyone. My bother r looking for themselve. And overall I have 2 children. Many time I want to leave my husband but cannot coz of my young children. my started beating me first I used to think he is influence by my in laws but now after 6 yrs of maarige he still beats me for silly reason every 15 to 1 month. My life is hell

If I wud b in yr place I wuld definetly goes to my parent. Atleast he will understand that he cant do this coz u hv yr parent support. If he loves u definitely he will never repeat and think twice before beating u. If still do after this and he will go on beating u lifelong . Do it now or u will never do it in future. Atleast very difficult after children.

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