Parents of Preschoolers  Discussion Forum

My child is 4 years, only child. She gets scared with every small items - with noise, being alone in the room, going anywhere without parents etc. She is very much attached to her mother. For last one year we are staying abroad -away from our close relatives. She feels very insecure without her mother and so she wants me to be there-always around her.
I am very worried about this nature and don't know what steps to be taken to bring her fear down? Mom replied. Hi -

Why don't you put your daughter in a playgroup or daycare setting so she gets accustomed to being around other adults and chidlren. Join a group or create one of your own.

Has she always been this way? Did something trigger this type of behavior? There isn't anything wrong with it, some children are born with an insecure personality and to build on that you need to make them independent and more outgoing. Please note that you will not completely change her, ever. It is that old theory of nature vs. nurture. The nature part of her has these qualities which can be altered but not eliminated and to eliminate it will make her someone she is not. Nurturing her will assist in developing those qulaities to deal with her insecurity.

Having family around is good but you need to build friendships. She will outgrow it at some point when she is in school but it would help to make her join activities, or put her in a dance class or art class or singing class. These acitivities help to build one's confidence level as well as help to express her true feelings.