Relationships  Discussion Forum

I have similar MIL & SIL problems like others.It was very bad , like my mil wished that i should never get pregnant so it won't effect their financial incoming.She and my SIL even tried to fill my husbands ear for separating me from him.And like all other indian men my husband is also doesn't believe what ever i say to him.or even though he realise they are like that , he wants me to adjust , listen to the shit they talk.here is my problem:in this situation we can only act good in front of them & praise them in front of my husband.But my problem is I CAN'T ACT.I just show my anger to him.which is creating distance between us.This is the only one problem in our marriage, which never got solved after years of trying to solve.Otherwise we are truely in love by each other.And I feel that when ever we have fight regarding them, his eyes filled with tears & stays away from me.Doesn't love me like before.What should I do?? sowmya replied. dear anuradha,
i completely understand ur situation.i went through the same thing with my mil.i also felt i cant live this fake life acting through out & trying to be someone else which u are not.but believe me,u have to act in order to have a good relationship with ur hubby.by reading ur message i can clearly see that ur hubby really loves u.so dont loose his love by talking against his people.i understandthat they are totally at fault & even ur hubby can see that.but since its his mom & sis,he loves them too & it is very hard for him to speak aginst them.i'll tell u something from my own experience.stop expecting that ur hubby will understand u ?& fight for u.that can never happen.though he can see ur right,he cant fight against them.so become diplamatic in ur dealings.dont say anything against ur in laws to ur hubby.by doing that u'll only spoil ur relation with him nothing else will improve.instead what ever u want to do tell ur hubby that considering ur family welfare u want to do that.for eg if u want to have a baby,buy a car,buy anything,tell ur hubby that it will be good for our house,our family,we can enjoy with it etc.try this.then ur hubby will surely listen to u as he'll feel u have no hatred towards his parents & all u care abt his family happiness.so he'll start behaving as u want to.slowly u can bring him to do the things u like. dont spoil ur relation with ur hubby for anything.all this will fade away wid time.finally only u & ur hubby will be together.so take it easy & enjoy life wid ur family.hope this will help u to atleast some extent.all the best !!!