Planning a Baby  Discussion Forum

i am ttc for last 6 months.i have regular periods and i can detect my ovlution period easily.my husband is always tired from his work in week days and interested in having sex only on weekends.everytime(for last few months) when there is my ovlution period starts we r on trips or somebody visit us.and b'cos of this we have only 1 or 2 days for ttc.this time my ovu.period lies between monday and sat and my husband is not much interested in having sex in week days.He thinks he done a great job by having sex in consective 2 working day(again we ttc 2 days this month).I heard that not to come in tension for not having baby but my hubby's behaviour make me cry though he loves me lot. everybody in my relations point me for my age,late marriage and even for not having baby.i think this is a unique problem of a women.What u ppl think?is there anybody with same problem? TX replied. I had a very similar problem with my husband before conceiving my son. We were married for 5 yrs and I was very strongly urging for a baby. I was already 29. He would insist on using protection. It was really creating stress in my daily life. I waited a year patiently. Unfortunately the only thing which worked was to tell him that if we did not try to conceive within a year I would return to India and stay there indefinitely. Though he loved children he was not yet mature enough to take the responsibility. Once he realised how badly I was yearning for a baby he changed his ways. Now, he is a very caring and doting father. Does not like it even when I raise my voice at my son.

God bless you in your efforts. Hope this was not too harsh. archie replied. deepti,
your problem could not be generalized because some will have similar situation as yours while some don't.

You should get one thing straight and that's this, by crying or getting stressed you will not get pregnant. If your spouse is not willing to try in working days there is nothing you can do or anybody could help you out with.

At the same time forcing him to help with ttc on working days won't be good idea. Because he is going through stress when having sex out of will and is absolutely going to lead to failure. Do you want that to happen and continue putting you in confusion and negative environment.

Regardless of relatives and friends throwing their blame at you, learn to be relaxed and ignoring their blames.

I did not understand when you said your fertile period is between MOnday to Saturday? That could not be the case. It may be that your fertile period is between Saturday to Monday because ovulation prediction will offer you two fertile days than five fertile days. If so then having intercourse on Saturday or Friday night is best you could do. Make sure your spouse does not feel forced and he is doing with his own will.

Believe me after six more months of trial you will go to Dr and when you get data that you are fine then all your relatives and friends will be quiet.

But I say why to wait that long. Just give try when he wants and you want. May be it seems you want baby more than he does and you are forcing him to enter in parenting when he is not ready and that's absolutely unhealthy.

I am sorry if I am strong but I think you should work on this on your own.

Archie