i am widow and my daughter is 4 years old she has not seen her father because he died before she was born now a days she is asking many question about him she wants to know where he is how he is inspite of telling me he want come as he has gone to god she ask me questions like do he see me from sky then if i answer her yes then more question comes i am working person and this situation has taken me back to past and is effecting my work in no way she is accepting that he is dead please help me to handle this situation as i can't see my dughters sad face
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i am widow and my daughter is 4 years old she has not seen her father because he died before she was born now a days she is asking many question about him she wants to know where he is how he is inspite of telling me he want come as he has gone to god she ask me questions like do he see me from sky then if i answer her yes then more question comes i am working person and this situation has taken me back to past and is effecting my work in no way she is accepting that he is dead please help me to handle this situation as i can't see my dughters sad face
Mark replied. I am Mark, Indian /Male/ working in Dubai last 8 years, I am a single parent for my 10 years old daughter & I am taking care of my daughter by facing lots of internal as well as external problems. You can imagine how difficult is bringing up a small kid in foreign country like UAE. I read all the problems and issues of single parenting. b coz I am experiencing that. Any one want to discuss their problems regarding single parenting, or husband and wife separation issue i am ready to join with them to find good solutions. Me and my wife separated almost 8 years back ,In that time every one said Father can not take care of baby girl , I took that challenge and she is now 10 years old. I didn’t tried to get marry also. I used to read lots of issue here, I wish to get involve and find some solutions for them. For that any one can contact me. thru email.
Best of luck for every one
Rgds /
Mark from UAE
chitra replied. hi,
i am a single mom with 2 boys. my husband died when one was 3 and the other 6 months. i have told them that he has become a star and stars can never return. but they are always in the sky and can see you. you can talk to your dad anytime - look at the star or at his snap - and tell him anything you want. i believe that if you say this with conviction - it could help. the younger one is 3 now- and soon he will ask me questions - and this is how i hope to handle them.
i hope this helps - but donot tense yourself over the issue- deal with it as if its very matter of fact. a child can sense if you are not happy with a situation and that makes them uncomfortable. so the most important is how you yourself feel.
all the best
Nina replied. Hello dear,
I am very sorry to hear that you are widow with a small child to raise.
I cannot say I understand exactly how you feel, but I do have some things to share with you that may make you and your child feel at ease.
Since your child is 4, she is going to ask questions and it's not that she isn't satisfied that her father is deceased, but she wants to know more about him.
Here is what you should do.
Collect pictures of your husband and put them in a photo album, put your daughters pictures in the album too. Give this to her and tell her when she thinks about her dad, she can look through this and she will feel close to him.
Also, if you are comfortable with this, make a little \";memorial\"; for her to express her love towards him. Let her decorate it with pictures, silk flowers, incense and so on. Let her keep it someplace in the house you are okay with.
Every evening when you put her to bed, give her a kiss on the left cheek, tell her that kiss is from you, and kiss her on the right cheek and tell her that kiss is from her father.
You should not expect her to stop talking about her dad whom she never met...as she is growing older, she will see other children and their fathers and she will ask more questions.
I know you must feel sad, but just talk about all the good stuff her dad was about.
If your late husband has any brothers, maybe you should ask them if they would tell your daughter about her dad when they have a chance to see her.
God Bless,
Nina
2005-05-22
#1
Name: Mark Subject: Help for Single Parents
I am Mark, Indian /Male/ working in Dubai last 8 years, I am a single parent for my 10 years old daughter & I am taking care of my daughter by facing lots of internal as well as external problems. You can imagine how difficult is bringing up a small kid in foreign country like UAE. I read all the problems and issues of single parenting. b coz I am experiencing that. Any one want to discuss their problems regarding single parenting, or husband and wife separation issue i am ready to join with them to find good solutions. Me and my wife separated almost 8 years back ,In that time every one said Father can not take care of baby girl , I took that challenge and she is now 10 years old. I didn’t tried to get marry also. I used to read lots of issue here, I wish to get involve and find some solutions for them. For that any one can contact me. thru email.
Best of luck for every one
Rgds /
Mark from UAE
2003-12-05
#2
Name: chitra Subject: believe in what you say
hi,
i am a single mom with 2 boys. my husband died when one was 3 and the other 6 months. i have told them that he has become a star and stars can never return. but they are always in the sky and can see you. you can talk to your dad anytime - look at the star or at his snap - and tell him anything you want. i believe that if you say this with conviction - it could help. the younger one is 3 now- and soon he will ask me questions - and this is how i hope to handle them.
i hope this helps - but donot tense yourself over the issue- deal with it as if its very matter of fact. a child can sense if you are not happy with a situation and that makes them uncomfortable. so the most important is how you yourself feel.
all the best
2003-11-12
#3
Name: Nina Subject: children and their questions
Hello dear,
I am very sorry to hear that you are widow with a small child to raise.
I cannot say I understand exactly how you feel, but I do have some things to share with you that may make you and your child feel at ease.
Since your child is 4, she is going to ask questions and it's not that she isn't satisfied that her father is deceased, but she wants to know more about him.
Here is what you should do.
Collect pictures of your husband and put them in a photo album, put your daughters pictures in the album too. Give this to her and tell her when she thinks about her dad, she can look through this and she will feel close to him.
Also, if you are comfortable with this, make a little \";memorial\"; for her to express her love towards him. Let her decorate it with pictures, silk flowers, incense and so on. Let her keep it someplace in the house you are okay with.
Every evening when you put her to bed, give her a kiss on the left cheek, tell her that kiss is from you, and kiss her on the right cheek and tell her that kiss is from her father.
You should not expect her to stop talking about her dad whom she never met...as she is growing older, she will see other children and their fathers and she will ask more questions.
I know you must feel sad, but just talk about all the good stuff her dad was about.
If your late husband has any brothers, maybe you should ask them if they would tell your daughter about her dad when they have a chance to see her.
God Bless,
Nina
2003-11-24
#4
Name: mother Subject: child asking questions
Thank you very much for sharing my problemn
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