Relationships  Discussion Forum

Hi friends,

I am back again..had a confrontation with MIL yesterday. She started shouting at me for no reason. I spilled some “Atta” (flour) on floor accidently and she found an excuse to yell at me that I am purposely wasting things and bla bla.. She started used bad language and started abusing my parents..I could not bear it so I yelled back at her..She used foul language and Gaaliya (like Kutiya, Haramjadi, Kamini etc…to me and to my mom) I said the same gaaliya to her as she was shouting at me with all those bad abusive words. I told her that whatever she is saying to me and my mom and I will say the same things to her and her mom. I confronted her very bravely…before I used to feel shaky..but y’day I noticed that I was very strong..
I can hear things, if I commit a mistake, but I cant tolerate someone yelling at me for no reason…I gave her good answers to whatever she shouted at me…She even said that “ mein tujhey yahan se nikal kar hi dam loongi” (She is living with us in US and helping with 2 little kids when I go to work..I always giver her due respect but she is always upset with me…She always treats me as outsider and thinks that it is her son’s and her house….even though my husband and I bought the house together and my husband never says anything like that). I wont let her control me any more..

Well, The best part was that my husband was there too when all that drama happened..obviously he didn’t say anything to his mom…but he kept quiet and did not say anything to me either and his behaviour was also same with me…I hope that he realizes how mean his mom is to me.

I have really become stronger..Thanks to this message board and all of you for your invaluable advices.

Trs replied. Great going! glad you stood up for your self...and remember, its YOUR house, not your MIL's house so don't be afraid to set your rules and have them abide by it. Calling you bad names is unforgivable, If it was my MIL, I would have ripped her tongue out. Be strong and don't let this MIL bother you.

TRS Rashmi replied. Hi Priety,
I think instead of being an ideal bahu that they expect us to be, its better to be true to your own self. Confrontation is the best method to teach them a life long lesson especially when u r being provoked intentionally. I also confronted my mil during my last visit & I feel I am at peace with myself after that. Atleast if nothing, these creatures will start to think twice before verbally abusing their dils.
rgds,
Rashmi a friend replied. You rock girl! I wish i had such courage to face my mil. But its good that you confronted her. Hope she learned her lesson. She shouldn't have used foul language. And who is she to tell u that she will drive you out of your own house. Man that lady has some guts.
Good, this thing was bound to happen! And you handled it courageously!Bravo!