Relationships  Discussion Forum

Hi

i am a 30 year old working woman and a mother of 5 year old son. My husband is 35 year old.
we both earn handful of money in Bangalore.
we bought an independent house & a car on loan 3 years back, we both are sharing the loan. In-fact i actually earn more than him, and takes care of
major portion of financial commitments. and my job is some what secured than his job. if he loses job there is less chance of getting new one with same salary as his job and his education doesn' t match and he is working in same company from beginning. where as i have already changed 6 companies and settled in a big one. so it is difficult for me to quit my job for my kids sake.well this is all about our current financial and career condition.

Lets move on to our back ground.
my husband has elder sister who' s married and both are employed in a govt organization,. and has 2 kids.his parents fully depending on him but they stay away from us in their hometown. we pay monthly for their expenses. and they don' t keep good relation with me as lots of fight happened
when my child was very small. since my son is 10 months old he grown up in a day care and we didn' t get their support in bringing up my son.and more over i don' t like them as they are fake people. they don' t have property or anything as such.
this is about his family background.
I have 1 elder sister and 1 elder brother and they are all well settled in our hometown same as my husband' s. my parents are very rich. they 50 acres of land and my father is an officer. my mother helped me a lot in bringing up my child. they do help financially also sometimes even-though we earn.
now moving on to our relationship, we are married almost 6 year' s now. no bonding between us.
for silly reason' s we fight we don' t talk months together and we don' t look at our faces also.
we are leaving together, that is it. no communication between us. what happens usually is we fight for very silly reason and we stop talking, he never makes any effort to console/convince me. he doesn' t really care for me. i do everything in the house even then our relation ship looks like it is dead. if we are good we will be happy when we stop talking we will enemies i feel. we both just talk to our son, he is an awesome child and understands a lot.
i can' t write about all my fights. but surely i can brief, if his parents says something we should do, last week his mother called him told that we both should go to his sister' s house, i said i don' t want to go,if he wants he can go. we stopped talking. he is not talking to me now. i work day and night end of the day i feel so depressed. now he is drunk sleeping...i am crying now.
so irresponsible. i am doing everything he don' t bother to talk to me. i don' t expect sex and all from him. being in the same house we are living like an unknown. i feel so bad.forget it :(.

now why i came to this forum is i need help from all of you in taking a decision.
i love my son unconditionally, he is only source for my life. end of the day how much ever i am depressed, if i see my kids face
i will forget everything. his smile is enough. his touch is enough for me in this world.
my husband also loves him and takes care of him nicely.

the biggest challenge for me is that i am getting an onsite opportunity. till now i haven' t traveled. its a lifetime opportunity.
i have so many questions running in my mind. i can' t live without my son. if i go my husband would be very happy i feel as we
don' t have emotional attachment.
what will happen to our relation
i am having lots of confusion in my mind whether to go or reject the offer.


please please help.
aanchal replied. hello huthu,
you dont worry, if your husband and you both love your son so much, then why you both fight with each other, was your arrange marriage or love marriage, so take care of yourself. rohit replied. hello hichu,
feel so sad after read your question, but your son is very understanding as you mentioned so its good thing for you, and dont take tension he is your son, and mother and son relationship is so special in any condition. Riitika replied. Hi there are a lot of problems working women face these days you really need to stay bold enough to face it and somehow manage life. Thats the only way left out these days as this story is common Ashna replied. See as such your relation is not working and your husband is not as responsible as he should be but then if you are getting an opportunity to move ahead in professional life then you should go and take your son along if possible. Leena replied. Hey, life is full of challenges try to accept things that will always stay good for us Megha replied. Hello Lady,
So you are in dilemma that you want to move to onsite or not what did your mind say are you interested to move or not because you had good opportunity in your hands and you cannot leave it it would be better discuss with your husband. Megha replied. Hello Woman,
So you are looking for the person and you have to think about that i wish you are dare person then you need to have brave also i wish it would be the better thing if you share about that also. anuja replied. i think you should grab the opportunity and and make your career strong atleast. i don't thinnk so u have any hope frm ur relationship so forget about it and think about your son. when he will grow up u will have enogh money to support whatever he wants to do but when you go ouside decide whether you are taking your son along with you or not. i will suggest take him with you because there are chances that your husband will say bad things about you and will brk ur son from you so take your son along with you. i know it is very difficult to do but rather than son see you fighting better to separate. tinu replied. I know, It may be too late for this response, u might have decided but still lets talk.I want to tell you very practical thing..if you grow financially, you will have at least support of your son, but if you will not grow ,there are chances that ur son will loose faith in relationships because of fights.. I know a family very similar to u. the lady destroyed her career for her son as her husband didnt supported her emotionally. Now the son says to to his parents that he never got so love from his parents as they fought whole life. He married to his collegue without parents permission .. Now the imagine the lady' s mindset. She is so upset. So decide with your brain.