Relationships  Discussion Forum

I have a problem. Please Help. I am muslim girl who ws born in USA. I had few relations w/o my parents known. I just found out I am arranged to marry a guy from my country. I like this guy but he is very religious as to my parents. I am not virgin any more but my parents nor does he know. If they knew It will be shamed both for him and for my family. Some of my friend told me about a precedure that can be done so he can't know i was not virgin but I don't know what its called. I really want to do this beacuse I am scared of my family, him and his family and for my life. I wanted to ask my doctor but she is my families friend. Can you please help me answear this. IS there just thing? THanks LA replied. Find a different doctor who doesn't know you or your family. Honesty replied. This is the part that sickens me. Marriage, is not like returning an item. Please, search the answer within yourself. You, already don't agree with his values. Folks, from back home. God, only knows what they are thinking. I have a hard enough time here. Plus, there are cultural, societal, and language differences. Please, think this marriage through. Ok, virginity-how do you feel overall? Personally, go with your gut feel. Marry someone who you are 100% compatible with. Love, is self sacrifice. I, can't stand crazed assed religous punks. I am in my 30's and damn proud of being single and happy!!! Good luck. I hope this helps. Neha replied. Jale - If you always knew and feared your parents reaction to your deeds, how did you get involved in such a situation ? Didnt your conscience kill you ? In any case, I guess, what vai says is true. In this modern world, we cant prove virginity which is a plus for you. However, dont get offended by what i am about to say now but honestly - Just get yourself tested for STDs before you get married if you have been with more than one partner. Just an advise. Honestly, not being a virgin anymore should be the least of your worries now, testing yourself for STDs should be a priority. Virgin or not virgin is not the qs anymore.