Relationships  Discussion Forum

Hi there

i am married from last 3 yrs & have 6 months old baby. My problem is -i don't get emotional satisfaction from my husband. Before having a baby i was ok, though i always knew this somewhere back of my mind. I always try to keep him satisfied in every way. He is also very very helpful to me in most of the daily chores, except baby care. But after having a baby, our relationship feels like 'just fulfilling each other's need. I don't see any warmth in our relationship. He never comes close to me.. to hug me or to kiss me unless he wants sex. He says sex is his way to show love, but not for me. I am very open to say what exactly i want in very clear terms. I have explained it to him that i miss so & so from you... but still it doesn't change him a bit. Initially i used to initiate the hugs, but now i have also reduced thinking that he will miss that & understand my point... but in vain!! Specially after having the baby when i needed so much support & care, i didn't find him there for all that. While i have been there for him all the time for anything he wanted.. and he knows this. I feel very depressed... life looks so practical to me now... just doing our duties.
Am i expecting too much for my emotional needs?

Thanks
Amy Lovey replied. Here's the basic problem. There is no vocal way that things are being communicated. From what I read, everything is subconscious. Both parties, must initiate for a satisfying relationship. Furthermore, nothing should ever be taken for granted. How about a night out?? Maybe, not too far away. I am a romantic at heart. I, believe in listening and satisfying my future spouse's needs. A lady, is far too precious to be taken lightly. Know of any good single women?? I hope this helps. khyati replied. no, you are not expecting much. i have the same problem as you. i have 11 month old baby and feeling same as you.things have changed like anything.i am looking for some expression of love and care.i have also stopped expressing my love and care as i am not getting.i feel life so mechanical and dry. its really depressing. vs replied. I think your situation is the culprit. I am sure your husband loves you as much as before and may care more than earlier but as I said the upheavel caused by the arrival of the baby into your lives has yet to settle down. Most women go thru post-delivery depression in varying degrees because of harmonal changes and your emotional state could be due to this. Your husband may be feeling neglected because you are busy with the new baby and maybe withdrawn just because he does not know how to deal with the new scenario. Maybe you can gather some material on post-partum depression and rread it with your husband and find a solution between yourselves.