this is my opinion as an indian living in the states..born and raised here also..

first, these things like gripe water,janam ghulati,somva 34...they are up to you and your baby if u want to use them..just because our culture says it is good, that is not always true..you know a lot of these products are going to be reevaluated in india because of their composition..i was forced to give my daughter gripe water(by the elders in the family)when she was younger, and you know, she threw up 20 minutes after it..so i stopped..she is very healthy and no gas problems at all, ever...if ur kid can take it without problems, then go for it, if not, don' t worry..

massage...i don' t think it makes a difference..a massage of any sort feels good on your body, so your mind feels good, so you feel good inside...us who give birth here in america, don' t get massages...and we are up and running and perfectly healthy..i had a c-section and was walking and cooking in 2 weeks..i think our indian culture pampers the mother a lot, yeah our body went through a transformation, but massage for us for 6-8 weeks or more is not necessary..my sister is an ob-gyn and my mom a maternity nurse, and the most important thing to do after delivery is to get moving...walk, slow, but walk..

if u look at the indians living in america without massage,they are looking great..i personally think women here in america look great for their age and for how many kids they have..and i have to add, that a lot of indian women, like myself, do it on our own..we don' t have our mothers coming to stay for 6 months and then our mil for another 6 months..my mom has her own job and could only stay with me for 3 weeks..you cannot be lazy just because u delivered a baby..and the indian culture okays this laziness..

massage for a baby is important..here in america, they are also pushing that practice..they need it, they need that loving touch, and it is good for them..but for us, not necessary..

and i am strong,cooking everyday,cleaning everyday,taking care of 1 year old, and a dog...and i lost 35 lbs in one year, from diet and exercise..not because i got massaged..

please don' t feel bad in anything that i am writing, but u have to do what is practical and best for you..not what others say, because others always are going to say something..

Maddie replied. i know 40-50 yrs old indian women here in america, and my god, they look great..great bodies,great skin, and great outlook on everything..none of them got massaged,and have been working since day 15 after delivery..like prao said, if u have the pleasure of getting massage, then go for it..i just hate it when people feel sorry for you because you DID NOT get a massage after delivery.. so feeling old is something in the head.. prao replied. Gauri, I know u r waiting for Hetal' s response but I couldnt resist joining the debate after I read some of the responses

I dont think massage and all that r strictly necessary.. but then u spend your whole life working.. if ppl are available and ready to pamper you for 2 months y not enjoy it :)
Get a good massage, have somebody cook healthy food for you, rest, enjoy your baby.. whats wrong.. I totally agree that u need execise.. u should not just sleep for 40 days.. but it dosent have to be in the form of cooking and doing all the routine chores.. u can take pleasent walks.. do simple abdominal exercises..

Taking a few days off to relax and enjoy your baby is not laziness.. it' s one of the wisest things u can do considering how hectic life gets later on

If you have nobody to help u .. u have no choice but to start working.. but if you are fortunate enough to have a good support system... take the oppurtunity to relax.. dont go abt straining yourself just to prove a point gauri replied. one more thing i wud like to add here i had asked same thing to my mom n mil...my had said such females become old soon coz after delivery u have to do all this....my mil was of same opinion....she said u get health probs later in life...
hetal pls take soem time out i am desperately waiting for her opinion...
gauri replied. exactly ...i think u both understood what i am saying...i just wanted soem idea on this issue from hetal too..coz she has lots of knowledge about ayurveda...i have read her msgs about vaata ....ayurveda about babies i hope she throws some light on this issue too...
my best friend got mrrd n lives in california her first baby was born here in mumbai...tath time she was in mumbai only ...she followd everything...stricly ...whatever i did ...
but last year she too had son but this time she was settled in california...she was all alone with her husband n daughter hers was normal delivery ...she came home on forth day...she asked her gynaec about this she said its not at all necessary she was given doese of multiviatamins thats it...
n the moment she came home she said i was cooking ...n taking care of everything like before ...straight from hospital she went to mall for shopping for baby...
u must see her she wears all western clothes n her figure is just fantastic liek before...she is so active she manages everything all alone...
she said the same thing her friends too never did massage or anything ...
Swapna replied. Im sharing my thoughts here on this post partum pamper. I live in the US and from a south Indian state. We don' t have this concept of massage in our state. Like Maddie said,massage feels good whether you delivered a baby or not. I had some prenatal massages coz I had sciatic nerve pain and it felt nice when I had them. During post partum I never had any massage nor did I give one for the baby. Sometimes I massaged her as part of her bed time routine and never as part of culture or practice.(In fact MIL is asking as to why Im bothering with it!!!)
Tying the abdomen - I bought a post partum belt as soon as I delivered from the hospital store but when my midwife visited me the next day ,she advised me against it coz your stomach muscles needs to work their way back if not,they become dependent on the belt and become lazy. So I never wore a belt and voila ,now my tummy is flat like how it was pre preggo.
Here in the US, the nurses made me walk around the corridor after 12 hrs I delivered and gave a bunch of exercises to do even before I left the hospital. A lot of them were for abdominal toning and they helped a ton.
Im already at my pre preggo weight and my dietician is pushing me to go back to my lowest adult weight.
Diet - my mother put me on a strict diet after I delivered ,again a lot of ghee and such stuff and I packed pounds and went back to my pg weight. I quit nursing at 1 month ,went on a strict healthy diet and hit the gym 5 days a week and I was able to shed my weight without any problem.
So for anybody who' s reading this ,get back on your feet as soon as possible once you delivered. Walking and slowly building a good exercise routine is the key to getting the body back.
Like my OB says ,pregnancy and delivery is not a disease. It' s a natural process in a woman' s life. Your body knows what to do along with effort on your part.
You do not need to recuperate from it.

About those herbal potions - I never gave my baby anything besides formula. Not even water or gripe water. My mom gave a bottle of some herbal concoction and I did not eat a spoon of it. It' s still sitting on my counter. We don' t burn any stuff at home and make the baby inhale things.
As a newborn all that a baby needs is food to eat on demand, warm clothes and a clean hygienic place to sleep and fresh clean diapers. Nothing more.
My 2 cents.