Breaking-up is the toughest thing to do. If you are unhappy with your relationship read on to know how to break-up?

Two years ago Aditi and Varun had turned their friendship into a romantic relationship and started dating. They enjoyed each other's company a lot. Life seemed beautiful but as time passed Aditi realised that the relationship was full of flaws and it would not work out between them. As Aditi got closet to Varun she realised this is not what she wanted. She kept growing unhappy with the relation and finally decided to end it but did not know how. She was scared about how Varun would react? How would he feel? But she was sure that she wanted to end it.

Breaking-up with your partner is the hardest thing to do. Someone has said it rightly that 'It takes a couple of seconds to say hello, but forever to say goodbye.' When a relationship is not worth continuing, it is better to end it than carry complex problems that burden you. It is of no use dragging a relationship that you are not happy with.

Why do you want to break-up?

There can be several reasons to end a relationship. But you have to ask yourself 'why do I want a break-up?' There is a vast difference between thinking of break-up and actually breaking-up. You have to be firm on your decision to break-up and for that matter you have to understand what is the reason that you want a break-up. Once you declare your decision you have to stick to it.

To make things simpler take a notepad and scribble down the reasons why you do not want to be with your partner anymore? An abusive relationship, lack of understanding, lack of intimacy, finding someone better, conflicts in interests, infidelity, extra marital affair and lack of emotional or physical compatibility can be the reasons to break-up. Once you have a clear idea it will be easier to let your partner know about your feelings.

Inform your partner in person about the break-up

If you have finally decided to split, do it in person. Do not make the mistake of telling your partner that you want a break-up through SMS or Email. It is preferable to make way for your feelings face-to-face to avoid further chaos. Otherwise you may appear as coward or unclear about your decision. you have spent some significant time together and your partner deserves to know it in person.

You have to make your point clear without leaving any place for the doubts. You have to deal with his or her reactions. You have the reason for break-up and not breaking-up just like that. Your partner has every right to know the basis of your decision.

How will your partner react?

If you know your partner well, you must have an idea about how your partner is going to react after hearing your decision. You should plan how you are going to respond back and handle the situation with sensitivity and tact.

If your girlfriend or boyfriend is emotionally very close to you he or she may cry and shed tears after hearing your decision. Your partner may beg you for the second chance. You may get to hear these common responses like 'I will change', 'I cannot live without you', 'do not leave me'. Some partners may react strangely either by throwing tantrums or being abusive. Some may accept it quietly and will prefer to end it on a good note.

You are heading towards separation as you meant it. Do not stumble over your decision. Do not change your mind. You partner is going to exhibit an emotional outburst as now your ways are going to fall apart. Be prepared to handle your partner’s reaction.

Select a quiet place

Pick up a quiet place away from the crowds. Avoid places like restaurants and malls. You may get into an awkward situation in public places. Instead select secluded spots like gardens or beaches so that you and your partner will get some privacy to deal with the sensitive moments.

However do not go to places where your partner may react badly or do something that gets out of hand. Inform a friend about the place you intend to meet your partner at. It may help if things get out of hand.

What to say when you want to break-up?

Keep it short. Tell your mate that you are ending the relationship as you are not happy with it or the specific reasons you have. Tell him or her that you want to tell something very important and need their full concentration. Now you are ready to let the cat out of the bag.

Be sincere and straightforward to say that you have decided to end the relationship. Explain why you want to walk out of the relationship. You will get a hint of how your partner is going to react. Be calm and patient. Try to answer his or her questions but tell that it is your final decision and it is not going to change. Remember sooner or later both of you will cope up with your break-up.

Break-up dos & don'ts

Here are a few ways that can help you on how to break-up in a sane way. Keep them in mind and may be you can end your relationship in a dignified manner.

• Avoid a break-up on telephone or instant messenger
  
  
• Ensure that your partner should be first to know about break-up
  
  
• Be honest and true regarding your feelings
  
  
• Try to end it on a happy note
  
  
• Avoid playing blame games
  
  
• Avoid breaking up on special days and ocassions
  
  
• Make sure that you are not rude to your partner
  
  
• Avoid convincing your partner that he or she will find someone more compatible. They do not need your sympathy after you have announced the break-up.

Is it easy to break-up a relationship? How was your past relationship like? How did it end? To share your views and experiences, click here.