Parents of Schoolgoers  Discussion Forum

Hi everyone! Here' s the situation, I am a single mother of 3 small children (my 2 sons are also autistic, so life is usually extremely stressful). My ex-husband' s sister has a daughter who is 11 years old, and acts like she' s going on 30, and his sister always tries to pawn her daughter off on me. I' ve tried telling her I have things to do, but she keeps insisting. I' m always giving her subtle hints, and I am not the kind of person to be rude and say, \" Are you dense or do you just want to be annoying...I don' t want to watch your kid, I have too much on my plate already!!!\" So after grudgingly agreeing to watch her child, I asked her how long she' s thinking of leaving her with me. This woman had the nerve to say, \" as long as you can keep her, I don' t want to have to take her back and forth to the babysitter\" . What is that!!! For the record, I don' t have enough money to take on another child. Jessica replied. You' ll just have to tell her no... nicely... explain the situation to her, just the way you have explained it here... that you cannot take on the responsibility to look after another child, because you have problems of your own... clm replied. hi,
i' m a single mother with 2 kids - and life is really hectic: so i totally understand what you are going through.
but i am really sorry to say you are behaving like a doormat - allowing your self to get even more stressed out than you need to.
and the reality is that we end up taking out all the frustration on ourselves or on the children. and when we take it out on ourselves- realise that someday it will come out on the children - either in the form of anger - or because you will withdraw from them because you have nothing left to give.
i' m not preaching here - i catch myself doing this all the time.
and so i consciously say no to anything that can add to my stress...which doesnot mean it always works!!!! but it does help.
she is you EX husband' s sister - why do you owe her???? for what its worth - if a guy walks out on kids who need extra help - he' s got to be a jerk...and a sister who uses and abuses you ...the less said the better.
all the best - and take care of yourself. you are important - to yourself and your kids! :-)