My cousin lives in a 3 bedroom apartment along with her husband, two children, grand-mother-in-law, father-in-law, mother-in-law and brother-in-law. Her 6 year old son, went up to her one day and said, "Mom, I think you should buy yourself a new house." Quite surprised, she asked him why. He replied, "When I get married, I'll be taking this room. So where will you sleep?" 

- Jyoti Malhotra

Last Saturday night I had to baby sit my little brother. But alas, I was invited to a fantastic party next door. So after much thinking, I decided to attend for just one hour, with him in tow. My friend, Subhash was mixing drinks for everyone, and offered my little brother a mocktail. He loved the Virgin Colada. Next Subhash gave him a Virgin Mary, all under my strict supervision. My brother lapped it up. After which I forgot all about him and started enjoying myself. When the music stopped, a shrill voice piped up, "I want one more virgin." 

- Vikram Sawant

I have a 10 year old daughter and a 4 year old son. One evening my cousin came to visit us, with her pretty two year old daughter. I introduced her to my children, saying, "This is your new little sister." My son retorted, "If all the girls will be my sister, then who will I marry?" 

- Bharati Gopalani